RZ: "I would never join any club that would have me as a member."

6. What might we find inside your porn drawer?

RZ: One plastic KFC spork, two industrial-size cans of Skippy (extra crunchy) peanut butter, one slightly worn copy of Yes, I Can by Sammy Davis Jr. and my retainer.

7. Who's the sexiest rock chick?

RZ: That's easy. Lucy LaLucy del Rubio, the Stone Woman of Borneo.

8. Tell us about some freaky sex you've had.

RZ: Is reenacting The Last Days of Pompeii on a rusted Tilt-A-Whirl in the Australian outback with a troupe of female circus midgets considered freaky?

9. What's the strangest sex talk you've ever heard?

RZ: Here's a choice moment of sex talk I remember: "Swing me like a wild New Guinea spider monkey crawling up the British Commonwealth of Ernest Borgnine's lice encrusted lawnmower." Needless to say I just got up, got dressed, walked out the door and caught the next bus back to Jersey.

10. Which First Lady in American history made you the most horny?

RZ: I know this is an obvious choice, but I've always had a thing for James Polk's wife Sarah. This crazy minx sported a completely see-through gown at the 1845 Inaugural Ball that made J.Lo's infamous Versace number look like a potato sack.

11. Who was the oldest woman you ever slept with, and how old was she?

RZ: She wouldn't tell me, but she claimed to have been the entertainment director on the Lido Deck of the Mayflower.

12. What's the craziest thing a woman ever did to get backstage?

RZ: My Aunt Gladys blew the entire Ozzfest road crew. I told her I would give her passes but she said she wanted to handle it "her way."

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Photo: Courtesy Rob Zombie