Ringing the chimes

One of the best Playboy Advisor questions came from a reader who wanted tips on giving oral sex to his girlfriend. Here's an excerpt:

Q. Gay ladies say that only a woman knows how to please another woman. My lover doesn't exactly go out of her mind with ecstasy or multiple orgasms when I perform cunnilingus with her, and I'm beginning to think I need lessons. (Neither of us had done it before.) I feel like a dunce sitting in the corner looking at two walls. Maybe I could find a lesbian to give me tips on oral sex. What do you suggest?

-- D.H., Des Moines, Iowa.

A. There is one truth in the lesbian love rap. A woman can have fun without getting shafted. Cunnilingus is the perfect complement to coitus; what your genitals can do, the rest of you can do as well and more reliably. Face it and you'll find it is a pleasure to give pleasure without being worried about impotence, premature ejaculation or size. Explore and exploit the differences between cunnilingus and coitus. Save the penetration for later and focus lightly on the clitoris. In terms of pressure, less is more. Flickering touches with the tongue, nibbling, tugging or sucking motions with the lips, in combination with manual stimulation -- just about everything works at one time or another. Duration is open ended. A few minutes are fine as foreplay, but the event is fantastic in and of itself. Don't stop until your partner asks you to. If you miss a few days of work, it will be worth the effort.

Over the years, we received more masterful tips from readers. Here are a few of the best:

The Binaca blast -- Place six to 10 drops of concentrated Binaca breath freshener on the tongue before performing oral sex. Other OTC sex aids: menthol cough drops, Lifesavers, Jujubes, Crème de menthe and Amaretto.

Temperature -- Alternate sips of hot tea and ice water, to change the temperature of your lips and tongue. Or alternate a hot kiss with the stroke of a popsicle.

Anthropologists have located two Oceanic tribes who have an interesting variation on intercourse. The male sits; the woman facing him. He places the head of his penis just inside the opening of her vagina, moving it up and down to stimulate her clitoris. Up, down and sideways; slow, fast, using the penis as a paintbrush. When she is on the edge of orgasm, penetrate slowly. If you're unsure of the timing, have her grasp your penis and guide.

The paintbrush as penis -- Use something soft -- perhaps feathers or a silk scarf -- dipped in warm water or heated oil, to trace the most intimate parts of her anatomy.

Treat the clitoris as a tiny penis -- Give the glans or head the same attention you crave. Pucker your lips; create and release suction. Run your tongue or fingers up and down the shaft.

The six-pack -- Insert thumb in vagina, finger in anus, to massage the nerve rich perineum during oral sex.

Double-tonguing/triple-tonguing -- A trick from a trumpet player: To double-tongue, make your tongue move as if you are saying, Tah-kah, to triple-tongue say, Tak-kah-dah.

Connect-a-dot (also called echoes) -- Try to connect different erogenous zones. Stroke her clitoris with a certain rhythm while fondling some other part of the body -- ear lobe, nipple, toe or back of neck -- with the same rhythm.

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