How to Stop Being a Junior Executive

A Junior Executive is any male in an office who sits down. If you have carefully followed our detailed instructions on applying for a job and rising from the mail room in the last two issues, you are now a Junior Executive.

At first you will make considerably less money than the men who run the elevators, wash the windows, and shine the shoes. But remember--you are being paid not in money but in experience. You are learning! Some men spend their whole lives doing this, and when they finish they may have little in the bank, but they are rich indeed.

However, you are headed for the Top, so don't overdo this. Learn the business, yes, but you have other far more important things to learn, too.

Your Mission

As a Junior Executive you are the very pillar on which modern business rests.

It is you who must shoulder the load while Top Management thinks. Yes, this is what they are doing, thinking. They may not look it, but they are.

It will be your job, as a Junior Executive, to take over as many of their worries as you can. This will leave them as little as possible to think about.

Your Appearance

The keynote now is one of maturity, and of cheerful suffering.

Clothes. You need buy few clothes, since the Junior Executive does not dress as elegantly as the mail room boy. Simply have your brighter, more dashing items dyed mouse color or Oxford gray, and sprinkle lightly with dandruff.

Look Older. But don't be too obvious about it! Do not wear highbutton shoes, green eyeshades, or sleeve protectors.

Never exaggerate the importance of a few gray hairs, especially in the temples. This will mark you as a man of judgment. There are a number of good commercial preparations which are inexpensive and easy to apply.

Mustache. A mustache, well cultivated and closely cropped, will add years and a look of sly cunning. This latter, though undesirable as we have seen in job applicants, is a real Plus in the Junior Executive.

The Look of Suffering. The Junior Executive is expected to suffer, and if you cannot manage it, you must at least appear to. An ulcer is excellent. Grow one if you can, but if you cannot, a bottle of milk placed conspicuously on the desk will do nicely, if accompanied by a slightly pained smile.

Your Office is Important

The caste of a Junior Executive is determined by the size and magnificence of his office. In fact, when your office is indistinguishable from that of the Senior Executives you will be a Senior Executive.

Your first step will be to get any office. Few will listen to a man who sits at a hall desk. When you see an opportunity, go quickly to the office manager:

"I see that Mr. Grabble is leaving, sir."

"That's right."

"Do you mind if I move my things in there until the new man comes?" (Note: Never say "have the office!" It is always: "move my things in.")

"Is there a new man?" (There isn't).

"Hadn't you heard? Should be in any day now."

You will be allowed to "move your things in" temporarily. After a few months everyone will forget it isn't your office and it will be.

The Head Cold Approach is equally successful:

"Frideful code in the head," you say to the Office Manager, sneezing violently.

"Oh, too bad, Finch."

"Wonder if I could sid in the ebty office for a few days. Draft out here is derrible."

"Well, for a few days I think it'll be all right."

Such a cold can hang on for weeks. By this time it is wise to administer the coup de grace:

"I don't like to cobplain, but my office is fridefully drafty." (Note "my office.")

"Oh?"

"The one in the corner seebs to get the sun. This code, you know. Maybe you could swidge O'Brien in here. Strong as an oggs, O'Brien."

"We'll see what we can do, Mr. Finch."

After the transfer, the office will be yours until it no longer suits you.

Continue the process until you have at least four windows. A fourwindow man is one to be reckoned with!

The Furnishings. It is a careless man who neglects these! You will have to decide first what mood you want to create. Some prefer the severe and monastic, with straight chair and table instead of swivel chair and desk; others favor soft lights, oriental rugs, and incense; others, rococo; and still others, the tooled leather and old gold nothing-is-too-good-for-me approach.

Decide for yourself. Fit your personality. Your office is a frame for you!

In most cases you will want a generous supply of sofas, easy chairs, portable bars, credenzas and bric-a-brac. The company will supply these.

But remember that a caste system governs all office furnishings as well as offices. Furnishings are handed down until -- by the time they reach the Junior Executive -- they are a sorry sight indeed. It is simple to beat this unfair system, if you remember the Magic Time.

There is a Magic Time to pick up really suitable furnishings. First, prepare a list of the different items you would like, in various offices. Then, as their occupants leave the company or are transferred, simply summon the porter:

"Oh, John, sometime today will you pick up that breakfront in Crabtree's old office?"

"I thought the new man was coming in Thursday, Mr. Finch."

"He is. Crabtree wanted me to have the breakfront, though. He mentioned it specially. When you bring it in, move it against this wall, please, next to the bar. You can take this old thing here and move it in for the new man. He may like it, you know."

Soon you will have a real show place.

But always remember -- you are not doing this for yourself.

"It's quiet," you will say, "that's the important thing. These six windows are a distraction, but I don't really mind. Just give me a desk, a pencil, and a piece of paper. I can work anywhere."

Desk Management

You will soon have to decide whether to adopt the very full or very empty desk approach. There is no middle ground. A few papers on a desk look messy and inefficient. The keen young man keeps either a polished expanse of bright wood, or a great overflowing mass of work. The one indicates cleanliness and efficiency, the other herculean effort and overwork.

Both are good. Decide now which course you will follow.

Calendar Management

The same reasoning applies to the notations on your desk calendar, which is on top of your desk, for all to see. Confine yourself to one or two simple notations, such as:

"J. B. -- All Day.

Lunch -- Stork. B.S."

The "Lunch, Stork" -- "Lunch, Colony" -- or "Lunch, 21" is advisable in all cases, even if you plan to duck out for franks and beans at a lunch counter.

Or, you may prefer the Cluttered Calendar approach, with dozens of appointments, scores of notations, appointments scratched out and replaced with others. This is especially effective if combined with the absolutely clean desk. It creates an impression of feverish but antiseptic activity -- and will win you admiration everywhere.

From "How To Succeed in Business Without Really Trying," copyright, 1952, by shepherd Mead, published by Simon & Schuster.

There is a Magic Time to pick up really suitable furnishings