DD in 3D

Any girl with blonde hair, a glistening lower lip and a mobile fanny will, sooner or later, be labelled The Marilyn Monroe of Lower California, Upper State New York, or Chagrin Falls, Ohio, by some unimaginative press agent or other. There's a mite more meaning, however, to the title "Marilyn Monroe of Great Britain" as applied to 24-year-old, blond-haired, glistening-lipped, mobile-fannied Diana Dors.

The difference is that Diana reached her present lofty position via the same primrose path traveled by Monroe: posing for photographers in a state quite close to nature. And, what is more, doing it in three (count 'em) dimensions.

Diana Dors was born Diana Fluck, a fine old English name, though admittedly somewhat difficult for others to pronounce, as Diana discovered upon reaching years of maturity.

Maturity came early for Miss Fluck: at the age of thirteen she was squeezing her seventeenish convexities into a tight swimsuit and winning beauty contests. Little more need be told, if you are familiar with the classic concomitants of beauty contests: Diana's fortune, if not Diana, was as good as made. After tucking a few more years under her svelte belt, modeling and film jobs began to come her way with refreshing regularity; and, to make this short story even shorter, she eventually emerged as Merrie England's merriest screen siren.

Miss Dors has been fortunate in receiving publicity enough to satiate five or six Marilyn Monroes. "I'm one of those people Things happen to," she has been known to declare; adding, "but if they don't happen, I don't mind giving them a little help." With Diana's help, these are some of the Things that have happened:

With royalty: Bowing low before Queen Elizabeth, as custom dictates, her natural gifts became so apparent that the conservative wing of the British press got huffy about low-cut ladies whose dresses delve below "the Plimsoll line" of modesty.

With the law: Hauled into court for non-payment of rent and copping a plea as a minor (she hadn't yet turned 18), her Gilbert-and-Sullivanesque judge ruled it was the court's duty "to protect infants," whereupon the not-so-conservative wing of the press ran a photo of a diapered Diana under the headline, Judge says this baby needs protection.

With the censors: Instructed, in a film called Value for Money, to reach from behind a bathroom door for a towel, she reached with a good deal more than her arm, thus causing that particular strip of celluloid to end up in the limbo of lopped-off footage.

With the Venice Film Festival: Interest swerved from cinematic art to navel maneuvers as she floated in a gondola down the Grand Canal, clad in a Bikini made of mink.

With bibliophiles: Lovers of rare volumes plunked down coin of the realm for a novelty photo booklet featuring the near-nude lineaments of Diana Dors in 3D, which soon became an exceedingly rare volume indeed and convinced British film scions that Diana possessed that indefinable something known as Star Quality.

Choice excerpts from the 3D booklet are available for your inspection on these pages. And Diana Dors will be available for your further inspection this year in a couple of films due for U.S. release. They won't be in 3D, but they will be in VistaVision and glistening-lipped Technicolor.

Diana photographs herself in 2-D, shows a variety of expressions and has fun mugging for the camera.

A small booklet titled Diana Dors in 3-D helped catapult this beauteous Briton to stardom, and on this and the next right-hand page are three of the poses from the book that help explain why. These pictures were taken with a stereo-camera and we have it on excellent authority that if you place a fair sized mirror directly between, and at right angles to, the matching photographs, they will appear in three dimensions. Place your nose near the mirror's top and with the reflecting side on the right, close your left eye and look at the mirror with your right eye. Adjust so real picture and mirror image line up, then open the left eye and, with both eyes open, concentrate on the left-hand image. If you concentrate properly, all of Diana's delightful curves should appear in full, rounded 3-D. If not, console yourself with two provocative 2-D photographs—one for each tired eyeball.

Diana's dress raised eyebrows amongst royalty.

Her mink Bikini was a hit in Venice.

She's neck-deep in suds in her latest movie.