The Secret Formula

Gary claypool looked like the serious young man he was, a man to whom the virtues of diligence and industry were more than merely subjects for cynicism around the office watercooler. He was rising fast in the chemical concern which gave him a two-window office, and there was no doubt that he was heading topwards in the next few years.

Despite his dedicated ambition, he had a sense of humor, too. His eyes could dance, and his lips could curl puckishly. But on his third date with the beautiful green-eyed, black-haired Lisa Monahon, his eyes were foggy and distant, and his mouth drooped down wards.They went to dinner and the theatre, and ended up in Gary's cozy apartment in upper Manhattan for a nightcap. People who turned to look at them during the evening wondered why this well-favored young man,with such a stunning girl on his arm, should look like the embodiment of Russian melancholy.

Eventually, Lisa asked the question directly:

"Gary, is something the matter? You've been acting sounhappy all night."

She was sitting on the edge of a foam rubber sofa, sipping delicately at a weak mixture of brandy and soda. Her fur cape was still around her sculptured white shoulders, as if to make it clear that her visit was only a brief one.

"Have I?" Gary said. "I'm awfully sorry, Lisa. Didn't mean for you to notice."

"Then thereis something wrong. Can you tell me, or is it something you'd rather not talk about?"

"It's not that." He squeezed the glass in his hand and looked moodily into the amber depths. "It's what you might call a business problem. No use bothering you about it."

"I don't suppose I'd be much help," she said wistfully. "But it's good to talk to someone about it, isn't it?"

"Maybe so. Maybe so," he sighed, and slammed his glass on the marbletop coffee table. "All I know is, this thing has got me so tied up in knots, I can't sleep or eat or– –"

Her eyes widened."Well, don't be so mysterious! What is this big problem."

He stared at her.

"All right. I'll show it to you."

Gary got up from the sofa and walked through the doorway of his bedroom. When he returned, there was a plain. clear-glass bottle in his hand, stopped by a cork. Inside the bottle was a cool blue liquid.

"This is the problem,"he said grimly.

"This little baby."

"What is it? Some sort of chemical?"

"Some sort is right." He turned it around in his hand."This is called Formula X-14. Nothing mysterious about the name, it just means that it's the result of the 14th experiment made in our laboratory. It came out of some work we're doing for the Ardstein people. You know, the perfumers."

"Oh. sure," Lisa said. "But is that what your company does? Makes perfumes?"

"Not quite. We handle all kinds of chemical problems, and that's what Ardstein brought us a few months ago. I was personally assigned to the project, and all the major decisions land in my lap. That's what got me so balled up. I don't know whether to turn this stuff over to Ardstein and collect our fee – or drive up to the George Washington Bridge on a dark night and drop it into the river."

"I don't understand," Lisa blinked.

"What is the stuff?"

"It's a perfume. That's all it is. a perfume."

"What's wrong with it? Can I smell it?" Her nostrils were twitching curiously.

"Sure, go ahead. It smells OK, just like an ordinary perfume. And it doesn't do any harm in the bottle."

Lisa removed the cork and sniffed."Smells pretty good. But what do you mean by harm?"

"I meanharm," Gary said, taking Formula X-14 from her."It's the damnedest thing I've ever run across, and it's given the company a hell of a problem. You see– –" He rubbed a hand over his scalp. "I don't know how to tell you this. But you read the perfume ads, don't you?"

"Sometimes."

"Well, you know what they all claim. Soak a little of our stuff on your earlobes, and men'll be panting after you."

"So?"

"So that's our problem. Believe me, a big problem. On account of this stuff really works that way."

Her beautiful green eyes went wider still. "What do you mean?"

"I mean exactly that! When this perfume makes contact with a woman's skin, it makes her absolutely irresistible to men. So help me! Take any woman at all, add a little Formula X-14 and you've got a potential rape case. It's frightening!"

"You're joking!"

"I'm dead serious. We saw the reaction on our experimental animals. Then we made the mistake of trying it on Miss Gower, one of the lab workers. Now, Miss Gower is – well, to be blunt a kind of homely woman. But two minutes after this stuff went on her, old Funston gave a shriek like a bull elephant and went for her. Old Funston! He's 74 years old. He's so old he falls down. But he went ripping and tearing after Miss Gower like he was a sailor on a one-hour pass. Right in the laboratory, he rips off her blouse. He was working on her skirt when they pulled him away."

"How awful!" Lisa said.

"Awful is right! We had a hell of a time putting the security lid on what happened. We know what Ardstein would do if they heard about it. They'd want Formula X-14 in the worst way. They'd have the biggest perfume in America!"

"And will you give it to them?"

"That's just the issue. If we ever release the stuff, just think of the result. There'll be havoc everywhere it goes. Women will be attacked on the street, Men'll go to prison. Husbands will divorce wives. Crazy as it sounds, Lisa, this little bottle could start a national panic!"

She was staring at the blue liquid, and her breathing was heavy.

"It's amazing." she whispered. "It's simply amazing, Gary. I never dreamed.such a thing was possible– –"

"Science is wonderful, all right. The only trouble is – how do we control it?"

She picked it up.

"Gary – I'd like to try it."

"What? You're out of your head!"

"Please! I just have to see if it's true."

"Give me that bottle, Lisa." He said it quietly.

"I must!" she said, clutching it to her breast. "I've just got to try the stuff." Her hand fumbled with the cork. Gary reached desperately across the marbletop and caught her wrist. They struggled for possession of the bottle, until Lisa triumphantly broke away and ran to the other side of the room. She shook a few drops into her hand and placed them on the lobes of her pink ears.

"Lisa, don't!" Gary shouted. "You don't know what you're doing!"

He jumped off the sofa and ran to her. As his arm shot out to recapture the bottle, it dropped from her hand and fell to the floor. The contents of Formula X-14 spilled out, and the carpet soaked it up greedily.

"You shouldn't have done that!" he panted. "You shouldn't have, Lisa!"

"I'm sorry, Gary– –"

"I don't care about the formula!" he said hoarsely. "But you. I care about you" He looked at her with gleaming. hungry eyes.

"Gary,no! I'm not that kind of a girl!"

"I can't help myself!" he choked, advancing upon her."I just can't help it, Lisa!" His fingers tugged at her furcape, pulling it from her creamy shoulders.

"No, Gary! Stop it!"

He was embracing her, his hands moving madly.

"You shouldn't have done it!" he rasped."I can't stop myself, Lisa! I can't stop myself– –"

"You poor darling," she moancd.

"You poor. poor darling..."

...

In the morning, Gary Claypool awoke late. When he saw what time it was, he hurriedly showered and dressed, and left for the office. But before he entered the elevator, he walked into the building drugstore.

At the counter, he said:

"Give me a bottle of perfume. Nothing too expensive."

In the laboratory, he filled an empty, clear-glass bottle with his purchase and placed it in his locker. Then, whistling, he took from his pocket a ball-point pen and an address book bound in Florentine leather. Carefully, neatly, almost fastidiously, he drew a line through the name "Lisa Monahon." In his office. he picked up the phone and made a date for the evening.