Sex and The Triple Znar-Fichi

Sitting indolently in his gravity couch, Nerl For-feech was lasciviously eying this month's Plaything magazine centerfold. The shiny cellulose pages fell all the way to the floor, because on the planet Znorr-fytt there are six sexes, and the photograph included all the erotic subtypes.

In this issue, as always, a gorgeous, nude Six sprawled in the typically suggestive pile, gravity being so low on Znorrfytt that any other arrangement would have resulted in the lovers' floating away. Their faces were lit with the ecstasy of romantic communion, their organs photographed to be all but fully visible. Nerl, idly fondling three of his protuberances, sighed as he viewed the tinted nipples, the arousing half-glimpses of fur-covered apertures.

Then, suddenly, the door iris whooshed open and Cleang walked in. Nerl, hastily stuffing the segments back into the magazine, almost fell from the couch as he attempted to hide the issue under some cushions.

Cleang giggled at her embarrassed partial lover. "Oh, go ahead," she piped, "you can unfold the layout again. I don't care. They are rather lovely . . . but so impossible, don't you think?"

Nerl threw down the magazine in disgust. "I wish you weren't so right. I've had only two Sixes in my entire life; and both of them got weird right away . . . right after. . . ."

His voice trailed off at the memory of it. The ecstasy! And then, inevitably, confusion.

Cleang giggled at her embarrassed partial lover. "Oh, go ahead," she piped, "you can unfold the layout again. I don't care. They are rather lovely . . . but so impossible, don't you think?"

Nerl threw down the magazine in disgust, "I wish you weren't so right. I've had only two Sixes in my entire life; and both of them got weird right away . . . right after . . ."

His voice trailed off at the memory of it. The ecstasy! And then, inevitably, confusion.

Cleang took Nerl by the trunk nooks and they clung together in mutual frustration. Cleang was Nerl's Two. And together they had a tentative Three with Albolon Farr-fingg, who, unfortunately, was, doing a loose sort of thing with a we. Three, and Four down in the Free-ex-District the swingers' playground in the city of Fachi-Forr-Forr. Albolon did have a tendency to be unreliable, but still they loved him. I a bit reservedly in return.

"What do you want to do tonight Cleang asked, licking Neri's eyeknobs playfully. But no Nerl it only made the craving for someone to be inserting into his side slits more powerful. Cleang was only a quasi fem, good for sucking and frontal contact and the like ... but he shouldn't be too unfair to her. After all, he was only a quasi him and had limited abilities as well. Like it or not, it was the way nature made them. With a dozen or so erogenous zones, the Znar-Fichi needed flesh on all sides, working in combination to produce the orgasmic culmination of multiple personalities. You could get off with three; four and five were better and better. But being a Six was the ultimate, and pitifully elusive, Total Turn-on.

"What can we do? Nerl echoed distractedly. "Is there anything we can actually do to remedy this feeling?"

"Sure," Cleang cheerfully volunteered, "we can go pick up Albolon and cruise a Triples bar. You never know what might happen."

"Not again," Nerl groaned. "I can't take it; the futile games, the flash and glitter. I'm just a simple person. All I need is a good, simple five-to-one relationship; that's not so much to ask."

"Come on," urged Cleang, lifting her appendages in his trunk nooks. The effect was sufficiently erotic. "You'll never meet anybody if you don't show your face. What can you lose? Would you rather stay home all night and masturbate in the washing machine?"

"OK, OK," Nerl gave in. "Let me get my threads on--my jewel-studded trunk shapers and my simulated-tumescence trouser pads."

"That's the way!" cried Cleang, getting up off his abdominal fold. "Dress up sexy!"

•

Later, the three of them strode snout in snout down the flamboyant promenades of Flesh-Bargain City, the official cruising ground for Znorrfytt's frustrated sexuals.

Cleang was buoyed up between her partial lovers, dressed in a revealing minisuit that left quite a few of her tubes exposed. The night was semitorpid, just right for the ongoing voyeurism of Six Sex Street. Of course, Albolon and Nerl were elegant beyond compare in their striped priapic enhancers. As they progressed down the brightly lit avenue, they caught the envious stares of lonely Ones and Twos, and occasionally the pitying glances of bustling Fours and Fives. But there were no Sixes. The Sixes would undoubtedly be at someone's apartment, in bed. Or else arguing.

Cleang, Nerl and Albolon stopped to peer into various bars, to see which one were running Threes that night. The formats always changed rotating the night club's patronage through all the variations. Two-Fours, Five-Ones, Singles Night, and so forth.

As they walked, peering through the transparent view bubbles of the different clubs, they were inevitably accosted by street hustlers making suggestive offers: "Say, honeys, I got just the Three for you, young never. Sixed before, any of them. Got a taste for some fresh action?" Or, "Need a massage, sports? Got a lovely pair, just juicin' to get their trunks on you." Ignoring the lascivious stares and remarks, Cleang, Nerl and Albolon at length came to one of their favorite places, The Sexagram Club, and saw that it was running Triples that right. The house band, The Numbers Racket, could be heard raucously blaring, and their pulses raced with anticipation at the wild action within. The Racket, a successful Four offstage, never failed to turn audiences on with their erotogymnastics and jerk-'n'-jell music. Cleang, Nerl and Albolon eagerly showed their I.D.s and entered the crowded, stimu-misted room.

"Hey, babies," a Triple, rocking past in an orbiting dance, called out. "Hey hey, let's get it on."

Cleang pulled back. "How unsubtle. Come on, boys, this is no place to meet nice people. Let's get out of here."

But Nerl and Albolon had already spotted some promising-looking action. "No, let's stay, Cleang. It was your idea in the first place. If we don't like it after a while, we can go someplace else." They pulled her farther into the seething mass, where the dancing bodies yanked and plopped spasmodically, imitating sex.

Onstage, The Numbers. Racket had sprawled atop one another in a simulated orogenital configuration, and up front, dancing Threes screamed their shock and delight.

Against the walls of the room, stimu-mist vendors lined up next to sensory-enhancement dispensers, which automatically exchanged money balls for the popular brands of dope. The rest of the room was all dance floor, with sufficient space in which to flirt, writhe and show off simul-sex aptitude.

Cleang and her hims moved onto the dance floor, their eyes constantly shifting across the room, taking in the more attractive groups, canceling out the ones who held no immediate appeal.

Since their tastes were relatively alike, they intuitively crossed through the various combinations until they were close to another sexy Three who seemed alone.

Perfect! A Three with two fems. Cleang lowered her tubes a trifle suggestively at the him of the group. Meanwhile, Nerl had shown a definite tumescence at the she in the flaming orange trunk-gripper. They danced up closer, coyly initiating eye contact. Albolon, however, didn't move correspondingly. He was too busy eying a fem in a different Three altogether.

Cleang (concluded on page 197) Znar-Fichi (continued from page 137) jerked at him and he staggered forward. "Idiot," she hissed, but the cute Three had caught the little interchange and had indifferently moved away through the crowd.

Nerl reprimanded Albolon. "You blew it for us, man. Didn't you see those gorgeous fems? We would have been perfect, I just know it."

Albolon cursed. "Ah, the one in the dotted tube-throttler was a pig. I almost scored another Three for us all by myself until you pulled at me so obviously."

Cleang waved her eyeknobs impatiently. "Look over there. Do you think we can all agree on one Three to come on to? How about that short-tall-tall number in the corner?"

Al and Nerl furtively checked it out. "OK. Let's go."

Again, they spasmed across the dance floor, dodging single and double Triples to get near the attractive Three that Cleang had pointed out. This one was a good dancer, doing all the most fashionable orifice openers among several maneuvering Threes. They were dressed in one of the latest cozy suits, a single, gauzy garment that joined the three bodies in a spacious but intimate arrangement. There was a very obvious zipper, where another Three suit could easily be hooked in.

"We don't have one of those suits," Nerl commented negatively. "This Three's too uptown for us. And look at the competition. I hate standing in line."

"Don't be a onesyhead," said Albolon, who lusted after high-class liaisons. "We're artists. Rich Threes need us."

"Now that I think about it," said Cleang abjectly, "rich people have no sensitivity. Maybe we should go check out that long-haired Three over there in the middle."

By the time they were in close, Albolon was dragging the others. The music lulled for a moment. Aggressively, he leered at the Three and said, "Hey, babies, didn't I meet you at a sensory-awareness clinic in Big Stir?"

The chic threesome laughed disdainfully and, without even answering, lost itself in the crowd.

Nerl and Cleang clung to each other in utter embarrassment.

"Albolon," she said sadly, "if we don't get out relationship together, pretty soon we'll be a Two."

Albolon farted from his side vents in frustration.

"Would that be so bad? I've heard you two talking together. I know what you think. You think I care about that Trip up in Snort Beach, the one you guys can't stand."

He was beating his trunks up and down laboredly. Cleang and Nerl stroked the pits with tender solicitation.

"No, no," they said, "we're not jealous of them, Albolon. It's just that sometimes your come-on ruins our chances."

Albolon backed away petulantly. "You're just possessive, that's what. Just because I like to check out things on my own.'

He turned, broke away from them, while they stood there stunned. All around, Threes were watching them and giggling.

"And you know," Albolon said stingingly, "I do get off on my other Trip. At least my Snort Beach floozy gives me plenty of space. Not only that but they give better trunk, too."

"Albolon, you're crazy," protested Cleang.

"You see," he said, his eye nooks wide, "that's what you really think of me when I'm being honest. Well, goodbye."

He pivoted and was lost in the whirling bodies. Cleang and Nerl tried to catch him, but the door of the club hissed and shut and Albolon was gone.

Shocked, under the mortifying gaze of twittering Threes, they left the club. Outside, the street was empty of Albolon.

With tears rolling down their face folds, they made their way across the livid avenue, but the lights and the gaiety had lost their charm.

"Let's go home, Nerl," Cleang said mournfully. "This is no way to find your nice, simple five-to-one relationship."

Nerl stood stubbornly in one spot. "Go home? Are you kidding? We just lost our Three. I don't want to go home alone tonight. I'm just not ready for it."

"You're not alone," said Cleang, a trifle peeved.

"You know what I mean," said Nerl, regretting his spite.

"I guess I do," she said fatalistically.

Nerl gazed up into the dimly visible heavens, reddish in the glow of the streetlights. All his anguish at the way they'd been constructed poured out of his heart and flailed weakly against the indifference of the cosmos.

"There are some worlds out there," he said distantly, "where I'll bet they have only three sexes, or maybe even just two. Different arrangements entirely."

Cleang laughed and took his center trunk with her snout. "Come on, Nerl. That's absurd. Think how dull life would be. It's all too simple."

He shook his shaggy mane, as if to dispel the far-flung fantasy. Taking his girlfriend by one of her more exposed tubes, he led her down the hysterical walkways in search of a Four-Two club.

"They spasmed across the dance floor to get near the attractive Three that Cleang had pointed out."