The Year in Sex

Frank's for the mammaries

When Globe placed Frank Gifford in a tryst with a former flight attendant, the sportscaster and his wife, TV hostess Kathie Lee, cried foul. "Total fabrication," they said. Globe countered with steamy photos of Frank and Suzen Johnson. (Not to be outdone, the Star and the National Enquirer proffered dueling pregnancy tales.) Kathie Lee often bubbled to fans about her spouse's great behind; a Playboy layout proved Suzen has an impressive front.

Caught with his panties down, marv fouls out

NBC fired Marv Albert after he first denied, then copped a plea to an ex-girlfriend's abuse charges. It didn't help that the sportscaster's DNA matched bite marks on her torso, that another witness testified she saw him in lingerie or that his name surfaced in the files of a dead dominatrix.

Show me the money!

Jerry Maguire's Cuba Gooding Jr. stripped to bare essentials to proclaim what soon became the year's hottest catchphrase.

TV or not TV?

Eddie Murphy insists his four A.M. pickup of transvestite hooker Atisone Seiuli (who, as evidenced near right, looks remarkably like Murphy's wife, Nicole) was merely a good Samaritan gesture: Seiuli, who's known in the trade as Shalimar, just needed a ride. Other TVs tattled to tabloids about their alleged past encounters with the actor, who, they said, only likes to look.

The dish on dennis

Anicka Rodman, ex-wife of hoopster (and Bad as I Wanna Be author) Dennis, tells all in her book, Worse Than He Says He Is: White Girls Don't Bounce.

Hands-on project

GQ's February 1997 subscriber copies featured an image of Dennis Rodman's hands on Rebecca Romijn's breasts; the newsstand version featured a tamer Becky in a bikini.

Full hearts, empty closets

Ellen's April outing scored the sitcom's highest ratings; as Ellen DeGeneres and her lover Anne Heche glowed, Oprah Winfrey felt compelled to squelch rumors that she's gay.

Show me the DNA!

After Autumn Jackson was convicted of trying to extort $40 million in hush money from Bill Cosby--she says she's his daughter--he gave blood for a DNA test to settle the matter. At that point, Jackson balked.

O say! can you xena?

Singing the national anthem at a Mighty Ducks hockey game, actress Lucy (Xena: Warrior Princess) Lawless lost it.

Lust in Cyberspace?

Surfwatch software, purportedly aimed at Internet fare such as that below right, blocked the White House site for using the dirty word couples to describe Al and Tipper Gore.

Out of body, out of mind

Dissing her two years with Playboy as momentary out-of-body experiences, 1994 PMOY Jenny McCarthy posed on the can and eyeing a plumber's ass for Candies ads that, despite being rejected as tasteless by magazines and TV outlets, sold shoes.

Rubber Bedroom Bungee Jumpers

Cords Unlimited's Bedroom Bungee device promises more bounce to the pounce via weightless sex.

Muff Said

"The only fur I'm not ashamed to wear," proclaims the beavered babe in this Italian ad for an animal-rights organization.

Butts Out

The models (from the prestigious Boss agency) and the messages are the same in U.S. and German versions of this People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals ad. In prim American media, though, the slogan turned into a bum wrap.

Make war, not love

No sooner had the Pentagon washed its hands of the gays-in-the-military issue than the specter of heterosexual sex raised its head. Among the combatants in the military's battle of the sexes: The Army's former top enlisted man, Sergeant Major Gene McKinney (below left), who faced a court martial for harassment; Air Force Lieutenant Kelly Flinn (bottom), who was forced to resign over adultery charges; and USAF General Joseph Ralston (right), who lost his Joint Chiefs of Staff nomination over a long-ago affair. The supporting players on the nightly news included drill sergeants and a horny recruiter.

That's busboys, not Buss Boys

Jeff Smith, television's Frugal Gourmet, lost a religious-network gig when seven former teen employees sued him over alleged sexual abuse.

Show us your willy, billy!

Right-on reports described Billy, marketed as the world's first openly gay doll, as "very anatomically correct."

Granny Goose, Meet Geriatric Ganders

The same media that cluck-clucked when 63-year-old mom Arceli Keh gave birth to a daughter oohed and aahed when Tony Randall (left) became a first-time father at 77 and Anthony Quinn had his 13th child at 81.

The Pam What Am

Maybe they should buy better locks: After yet another reported theft of intimate photos--this time on tape--Pamela Anderson and husband Tommy Lee found themselves on the international video market via the Internet (left). Meanwhile, the blonde bombshell apparently stripped down to host an episode of Saturday Night Live--complete with a sketch spoofing sister Playmate Jenny McCarthy's by-now-notorious farting routine (below)--before producing a brother for Brandon.

No Sex, Please, We're Baptists

As Southern Baptists announced a boycott of Disney over racy films, Ellen and same-sex benefits, respected publisher Simon & Schuster resurrected a bawdy Mickey, Minnie and other cartoon characters in Tijuana Bibles, a collection of vintage eight-pagers.

Guy Lib

When Playgirl published two-year-old nude vacation photos, Brad Pitt won an injunction against the magazine. Antonio Banderas branded shots from Playgirl, Celebrity Sleuth and the Internet (below) as fakes. Would you?

Show us Your Tits!

Now we know what she's smiling about: Pressing the space bar on your keyboard (www.satexas.com/coolfiles.html) gives you--presto!--Mona Lisa unfettered.

Russia's Secret Weapon

Russian Army generals sure know how to lift military spirits and keep the troops warm during those long Siberian bivouacs. They've cunningly recruited Playboy model Dana Borisova to host their official television show, Army Shop.

Celebrity Skin

Skin was in for actresses Milla Jovovich (left) and Victoria Abril (below top), both snapped at the Cannes Film Festival, and models Shalom Harlow (for Dior, right), Naomi Campbell (below middle, photographed during New York's Fashion Week) and Kristen McMenamy (flashing for Fendi, bottom).

The Moon Never Sets on the British Empire

In a flag-lowering ceremony shortly before the Brits left Hong Kong, an errant breeze ruffled the dignity of the Black Watch regiment.

Bare Market

Photographer Spencer Tunick's Naked States Tour drew dozens of volunteers to run on Wall Street (top), but Germany's Manfred Schonlau recruited a mere handful to pose by Berlin's Brandenburg Gate (above, right).

As far as we know, none of this took place in the lincoln bedroom--if, indeed, it took place at all

Rumors of sexcapades in and out of the White House kept the presses running, notably at the National Enquirer, where (1) Barbara Pfafflin, ex-mistress of former advisor (2) Dick Morris, told reporter David Wright that Morris found both (3) Hillary Clinton and (4) presidential advisor George Stephanopoulos attractive--and that President Clinton lusted after (5) Sharon Stone (who doesn't?). Other alleged good friends of Bill: (6) Whitewater defendant Susan McDougal, who denies impropriety, and (7) singer Gennifer Flowers.

Show us the Distinguishing Characteristic!

Paula Jones, the only one of these folks suing Clinton, claims Bill has "a distinguishing characteristic" beneath his briefs.

Boone to be Wild

When Pat Boone donned this punk studs-and-leather outfit at the American Music Awards telecast, a Christian cable net canceled his Gospel America show.

Battle Royal

Kitty Kelley's retelling of innuendos about infidelities and the purity of the regal Windsor bloodlines kept her new book from publication in the United Kingdom.

So Much for Camelot

Another purported JFK amour, Gunilla von Post, surfaced via a memoir; RFK's son Michael (right, with wife Victoria) was said to have had sex with a teen babysitter; Michael's brother Joe (below) quit his gubernatorial race after ex-wife Sheila (left) fought their annulment; and JFK Jr. branded his cousins "poster boys for bad behavior" while himself posing nude in George (right).

Farrah than the Rest

Despite a romantically rocky 1997, a bust-up with Ryan O'Neal, trouble with another date's girlfriend and a spacey guest shot on Letterman, Farrah Fawcett triumphed in a hot Playboy pictorial and chart-topping video.

What was she Expecting, Bingo?

Ex-Miss USA Shannon Marketic was shocked (shocked!) when a visit to the Sultan of Brunei's palace turned harem--scare 'em. A judge tossed her suit, though, ruling the ruler immune to U.S. litigation.