Playboy Interview: Ben Stiller

a candid conversation with the actor-writer-director about the downside of a flop, the upside of being mr. costanza's son and the lowdown on the dick-in-the-zipper scene

Ben Stiller walks through the door of Red Hour Films, his Beverly Hills-based production company, and apologizes for being late. Dressed in black warm-up pants, a black T-shirt and a sweat-soaked bandanna, he grabs a bottle of water and ushers a guest into his office.

"I'm a little behind today," he says, relaxing his compact frame on the couch. Then, almost as an afterthought, he adds: "I had a car accident."

Stiller is unfazed. In fact, what seems to bother him most about the unfortunate meeting between his Chevy Tahoe and a drycleaning delivery truck is that the only car available at a nearby rental lot was a new Mercedes. "I don't like it," he says, explaining that he got the Tahoe as an antidote to his old Jaguar. He dumped the Jaguar after he did an interview during which he and a reporter drove around.

"The whole interview became about the Jaguar," he complains. "I just want to be comfortable in the car I drive. I don't want to draw attention."

That's one of his mantras. Despite kudos for a versatile résumé that includes a writing Emmy for The Ben Stiller Show (1992), directing credits for Reality Bites (1994) and The Cable Guy (1996), and acting roles in There's Something About Mary, Flirting With Disaster, Permanent Midnight, Your Friends and Neighbors, Mystery Men and Keeping the Faith, Stiller insists he couldn't care less about being a celebrity. He'd prefer that people focus on his work.

For Stiller, work is a way of life.

"He works harder than anyone I know," his friend and sometime collaborator Janeane Garofalo told Rolling Stone. His father, Jerry Stiller, perhaps best known as Frank Costanza on Seinfeld, agrees. "I just wish he would take a rest."

Today, changes are afoot, in part because Stiller says he finally recognizes the importance of finding happiness outside his career. "My first instinct has always been to go off and work. Being there was easier than dealing with the real-life issues." Stiller's recent marriage to Christine Taylor---she played Marcia in The Brady Bunch Movie---is a big step in his commitment to "balance things and not lean so heavily on the work aspect."

It shouldn't surprise anyone that he's been consumed by work. His parents, Jerry Stiller and Anne Meara, are comics whose work often kept them on the road, leaving Stiller and his older sister, Amy, home with the help. During summers, they would join their parents on the road. "It was cool," Stiller has said. "And bizarre."

Stiller's first official acting job was playing a student radical on a 1985 episode of Kate and Allie. In 1986 he was in a stage revival of The House of Blue Leaves. He used the break to his advantage, persuading his veteran co-stars to appear in The Hustler of Money, a short film parody of Martin Scorsese's The Color of Money. He followed with a few movies---Fresh Horses, Empire of the Sun and Next of Kin---but he wasn't going anywhere fast.

In 1989 Hustler of Money aired on Saturday Night Live and Stiller took a writing job there---even appearing as a cast member. He didn't stay long, preferring instead to make short films and parodies for MTV. In 1990 Stiller got his own MTV series, The Ben Stiller Show. In 1992 he moved it to the Fox Network---with cast members Andy Dick, Bob Odenkirk and Garofalo---for 13 now cult-classic installments, critical raves, a quick death for being last in the ratings and a postcancellation Emmy.

Two years later, Stiller directed the Gen-X hit Reality Bites, though he is quick to minimize his role as standard-bearer for the slacker nation. "It's just a label mostly from movie journalists. It wasn't like, 'Here I am, the voice of my generation.' I was just making my first movie."

Even so, that film started the ball rolling. Stiller followed with The Cable Guy and then landed the role of the nebbish Ted in There's Something About Mary. Last year he played a sports gambler in James Toback's Black and White. His latest role is as an illfated groom-to-be in the comedy Meet the Parents, co-starring Robert De Niro and Blythe Danner. He's currently directing his first film since The Cable Guy, a comedy called Zoolander, based on a dim-witted male-model character he created for the VHI Fashion Awards.

We asked Contributing Editor David Rensin, who last interviewed Jon Stewart, to get Stiller to take a break from his work long enough to have a talk. Rensin reports:

"Ben was always polite, mostly unshaven and always wearing the same warm-up pants (he says he has more than one pair, and they do get laundered). He was a gracious host who tried to answer every question and seemed more at ease than his press descriptions of a cautious, inner-directed workaholic. In fact, he demurred only twice: when asked how much fun he'd had with a particular female co-star, and if he'd ever gotten his own penis stuck in his zipper. Understandable, particularly if one had anything to do with the other---not that we would ask such a thing.

"Stiller is the ultimate Hollywood man for all seasons, constantly on the move creatively---writing, acting, producing or directing, sometimes simultaneously. But wearing so many hats has made him hard to pin down in an industry that adores pigeonholing its players. I decided to begin the conversation by asking for Stiller's help in defining himself. I was in for a surprise."

[Q] Playboy: You write, you act, you direct, you produce. Where should we start? What's your hook?

[A] Stiller: I have no hook [shrugs and smiles].

[Q] Playboy: Good thing we cleared that up right away.

[A] Stiller: This is why I usually don't like interviews. I hate to sit there while someone tries to define who I am or what I do.

[Q] Playboy: Is there any particular description you just love to hate?

[A] Stiller: I'm always distilled into the easiest categorization: either the guy from The Ben Stiller Show or the guy from There's Something About Mary.

[Q] Playboy: Something between brilliant auteur and no-talent humonculous?

[A] Stiller: [Laughs] Yes, exactly. Both ends of the spectrum. I enjoy that word, humonculous. I always think of Woody Allen using it to describe Wallace Shawn in Manhattan. [Pauses] Also, being interviewed is very different from acting or directing, and I don't think I'm particularly good at it.

[Q] Playboy: Define "good at it."

[A] Stiller: It's just my perception, but I don't think I'm that interesting---and honestly, I don't want to be. One of the first photo shoots I did was for a little thing in New York magazine. The guy said, "Can you juggle?" Yeah, I can juggle. "Well, why don't you juggle?" Oh, OK. I thought you had to do what the photographer told you to do. There's a picture of me in New York magazine, juggling. Why the fuck am I juggling? To be interesting? I don't want a picture of myself juggling! I'm not a juggler.

[Q] Playboy: We were only going to ask you to ride a unicycle.

[A] Stiller: [Smiles] I just hate the burden of having to be entertaining in an interview. I don't want to be out there saying shocking things. My life is my life, and I don't want to worry about it being interesting to anybody. And if I do say something unexpected I'll probably wish later that it hadn't been printed.

[Q] Playboy: When did you decide you wanted to direct?

[A] Stiller: When I was 10 or 12. My dad bought me a Super-8 camera.

[Q] Playboy: Have you looked at those early films lately?

[A] Stiller: [Laughs] They're not very impressive. Especially when I watched the DVD of Saving Private Ryan and saw Steven Spielberg's home movies, the war movies, which look like major motion picture productions.

[Q] Playboy: You have been described as a workaholic. True?

[A] Stiller: I don't deny that tendency. I don't have kids yet, so the time I spend inside a project is the most freeing. Life, bills, the other stuff---that's tougher for me. My life becomes much simpler when I work. It's almost like a drug or watching sports. Get immersed and you don't have to think about real-life problems. But life changes. You get married and you can't live in that insulated, creative world all the time. I realize it is important to be in touch with real issues, because I don't want to one day look back and go, Wow, I've lived an unexamined life for the past 40 years.

[Q] Playboy: Are you living an unexamined life?

[A] Stiller: I'm trying not to.

[Q] Playboy: Are you an optimist in a pessimist's body, or a pessimist in an optimist's body?

[A] Stiller: I'm probably a closet optimist. Pessimism comes out of fear, and it affects the outcome of whatever you do. I think you have to be brave enough to be optimistic and then risk being let down. It's much more courageous to say, "Hey, I think it's going to work out. It's going to be great." I respect people like that.

[Q] Playboy: Who, for instance?

[A] Stiller: A perfect example would be the Farrelly brothers. From the beginning these guys were so up about There's Something About Mary. As directors, they said, "This is great. This is going to be so much fun." A couple of weeks into shooting they cut together the first 20 minutes of the movie and said, "You've got to see this. This is the funniest thing ever!" I thought, What the hell is wrong with these guys? They've shot 20 minutes of the movie and they're already talking about how great it is, how it's the funniest thing they've ever seen. We still have most of the movie to go. We're doomed. I thought they were way too happy with their own stuff.

[Q] Playboy: Were they?

[A] Stiller: No. It was funny. I learned a big lesson. It's scary to be positive about something, but being positive can only help the outcome. They could see something good and enjoy it. I always believed I'd jinx something if I felt like that. [Pauses] Life is a process, and I'm trying to learn from my mistakes.

[Q] Playboy: What mistakes are those?

[A] Stiller: Let me get out my list. One is that these past few years I've taken some acting jobs that I wasn't 100 percent, in my gut, happy with. Of course, I enjoy acting; no one has forced me to do anything. I just didn't totally follow my instincts. But in the end these were good mistakes because I realized that what I really wanted to do was my own stuff: writing, directing, maybe acting in it.

[Q] Playboy: Did you take these jobs for the money?

[A] Stiller: I've never done it just for the money, but I've allowed the money to be a factor. Each job had other interesting components. For example, Mystery Men had this incredible cast---and there was money, too. For a while there I almost played the Blue Raja.

[Q] Playboy: Why didn't you?

[A] Stiller: Mr. Furious interested me more, for obvious reasons. I think I have a lot of anger and fury in me [smiles]. I can see that quote below one of the three little pictures.

[Q] Playboy: Now's the time to punch it up.

[A] Stiller: OK. I'm prone to fits of violent rage, anger and fury. I've been known to hit a person and never say I'm sorry [laughs]. I could relate to the part. I wanted to try to channel some of the stuff I could connect with. I also thought it was a funny theme for a superhero: a guy trying to be angry and not really being good at it because he tried to be something that he wasn't.

[Q] Playboy: Another metaphor for Ben Stiller?

[A] Stiller: On some level. It's part of the human condition: We all try to fit in and be accepted.

[Q] Playboy: So what's the lesson here?

[A] Stiller: Like I said, after all these acting jobs, for which I'm grateful, I'm clearly happier directing. So there's my hook.

[Q] Playboy: Had There's Something About Mary been one of your first roles, how would you have handled the attention?

[A] Stiller: I would have thought, Oh, this is great, let's go out and do the next one! Then, when the next one wasn't as big a hit, I'd have been worried. Only because I'd already had a career could I understand how a movie that successful affects you. Even so, I still have to contend with it being the part I'm now defined by.

[Q] Playboy: Does that bother you?

[A] Stiller: It's taken a couple years for me to realize how much it's stuck. But it doesn't bug me, because it has led to a lot of opportunities to do different things.

[Q] Playboy: Does that include more Mary-like roles?

[A] Stiller: Yeah, sure. Of course. It bores me when people think that's what I would want to keep doing---but the assumption is unfortunately a basic rule of show business. There's also nothing wrong with trying something similar if it interests me or means I get to work with interesting people. Meet the Parents is very much in that mold. I did it to see whether I could play a Mary kind of character---which I already knew how to do---but not do it the same. I was also excited about working with Robert De Niro and Jay Roach---the director who did Austin Powers. I would have done the film even if my character was named Ted, like in Mary, and he had come on his ear.

[Q] Playboy: Did you know De Niro before that?

[A] Stiller: No. I was familiar with his work. I think he's done some pretty good stuff [smiles].

[Q] Playboy: Did you call him Mr. De Niro?

[A] Stiller: I looked for any way possible not to have to address him by name. I just said, "Hey, how ya doin'?" I was intimidated like anybody else would be. But, for me, that was the key to our relationship in the movie. In an actorly way, I never really wanted to get beyond that.

[Q] Playboy: How do you prepare to act in a Farrelly brothers movie?

[A] Stiller: It's all about having a good time, really, and I think that's intentional. You just show up and have fun, and pretend. There's a run-through, but it's so laidback. They're very much about not making the cast feel like we're doing brain surgery.

[Q] Playboy: Did you use a specific acting method for the scene when Ted's penis gets stuck in his zipper?

[A] Stiller: I'm a method actor. I pictured in my head what that would feel like. I didn't try doing it, though.

[Q] Playboy: How were you directed?

[A] Stiller: They just told me to scream really loud. Really loud. I always want things to be as realistic as possible. In Permanent Midnight, when I was beaten up, I put a bottle cap upside down in my shoe so I would walk with a limp. Everybody loves the zipper scene, but it wasn't the funniest one to me. I laughed the most when Chris Elliott has boils all over his face, when he has the pimple in his eye. His attitude was great.

[Q] Playboy: How many times did you have to do the zipper scene?

[A] Stiller: That one was an all-day thing. Frankly, the hardest thing was being in zipper pain all day while everybody came and went. I had to keep finding new ways to look like I was in hell.

[Q] Playboy: Was there a prosthesis for the close-up?

[A] Stiller: Yeah. It was five or 10 times normal size, so they could get a nice shot. They used to let it hang around the set all the time. We'd be like, "Hey, have you seen the zipper and the balls?" For a while I thought they might shoot the scene but not use it because it was too gross. But I knew anything could happen. Before I signed on they made sure I didn't have a problem with any of the scenes, including the stuff hanging from my ear.

[Q] Playboy: Have you ever felt like you've had your dick caught in your zipper in business?

[A] Stiller: Trying to make Budd Schulberg's book, What Makes Sammy Run? into a movie. Incredibly frustrating. I've been trying for years. I think it's been in every conceivable state of almost-happening but just hasn't come together.

[Q] Playboy: What's the problem?

[A] Stiller: Sammy is a tough character for people to embrace, because he's a guy who will do anything to get to the top. He represents the underbelly of show business that people in show business don't really care to explore. But it's an incredibly well-observed book that is still relevant today. The same things happen in the business now that Schulberg wrote about in 1940 or 1941.

This is probably why I can't get the movie made, why no one's been able to get it made since the book came out. I'm not the first to try. I would love to see the movie made in my lifetime. I want to play Sammy---that clock is ticking---but I'd be happy just to direct the movie. I think Leonardo DiCaprio would be good as Sammy. It might take a likable persona to put it over. But nobody will put up the $20 million---which is cheap by today's standards. Actually, I'm sick of talking about it; it's been one of the most frustrating experiences of my life.

[Q] Playboy: Maybe you should call it There's Something About What Makes Sammy Run.

[A] Stiller: Make it a comedy! Of course.

[Q] Playboy: What about your friend Jim Carrey? His every movie is weighted down with expectations of huge box office, and the speculation, "Is this the one that's going to get him the Oscar?" Do you think he agonizes over what to choose next?

[A] Stiller: He has a bigger image to dig out of to get people to look at him in a different way. If people have a limited perception of me from one hit movie, imagine the perception people have of him from five movies. Before The Cable Guy, Jim had five $100 million-plus movies in a row. I think it's smart of him to do different things because he can always come back and do a big comedy. When you're at that level, you can do whatever you want. Why not explore?

[Q] Playboy: What does the press keep missing about Carrey?

[A] Stiller: That Jim has a real connection to his audience, an audience that's beyond the press, beyond the stories about him, beyond if or when he'll win his Oscar. He had that connection before anyone in Hollywood got on board with him. He blew everyone away with Ace Ventura in the face of the press, which I've always admired. He feels his connection first and foremost. That's how he got where he is. [Pauses] I can't really speak for him, but I do know that whatever he does, he's not thinking of what the press is going to say about him. He thinks only about what movie he wants to make. I think he has a plan. He knows how far he can push it, and when to come back. He's not afraid of saying to his audience, "Come along with me. Let's try a couple things."

[Q] Playboy: Like The Cable Guy.

[A] Stiller: That's a perfect example. He was willing to say, "Let's take a chance here and go in a different direction." It came from all of us, though I had much less on the line because I wasn't the guy who for the first time would be seen in a different light. I had my own issues as a director, but for Jim it was a much bolder step to do a movie like that.

[Q] Playboy: Why did you want to do it?

[A] Stiller: There is a lot of funny, weird, uncomfortable guy-who-gets-in-your-space humor. It makes me laugh. I had a great time filming it.

[Q] Playboy: Did Carrey's $20 million salary bother you?

[A] Stiller: Why would it bother me?

[Q] Playboy: Because it saddled the movie with a certain stigma.

[A] Stiller: No. I was happy for him.

[Q] Playboy: Looking back, what would you have done differently?

[A] Stiller: The marketing was horrible. Everybody had input, but when you're a studio with a Jim Carrey investment, you do what you want to do. I wouldn't have come out in the summer. I would have emphasized that it was a stranger movie than those Jim had made previously---a little darker, more offbeat. We said those things and the studio said, "Yeah, yeah, that's a good point." Then they did what they wanted to because Sony had their first Jim Carrey movie. It's not surprising. If I were a studio head in that situation, I'd have done the same thing---hope people would go see Jim Carrey in anything, because up to that point, they had. I wish there were something I could say that would be the end of the story on The Cable Guy. But what can I say? People are always going to pick on it because it was the first Jim Carrey movie that wasn't embraced. Anyway, I'm sick of talking about it. It's water under the bridge.

[Q] Playboy: In a few weeks you'll start directing your first film in five years. Why the long hiatus?

[A] Stiller: Partly the media craziness surrounding The Cable Guy and the acting opportunities that came out of being in Flirting With Disaster. The six months after Cable Guy were hard for me. My agent said, "You've got to chill out for a bit." It was the best advice---he knows people forget quickly in this business. So I rode it out, which was great because it forced me to look at what I really wanted to do, regardless of being accepted or having a hit. I got to see the true nature of the business.

[Q] Playboy: Please enlighten us.

[A] Stiller: Most people's careers have ups and downs. And when I say down, I mean the experience you have when you come off of something that everybody doesn't love. It could be a creative success but a commercial failure. Putting yourself out there and not being embraced is where the true learning and growing come from, because then you have to look at yourself and ask, What do I really feel about myself when everybody else isn't telling me how much they love me? What am I going to do? Am I going to say I suck, too? Or am I going to ask what it is I want to do, what makes me happy despite public recognition? Before Cable Guy my career hadn't had major highs or lows. People liked The Ben Stiller Show, but it got canceled. Reality Bites got attention, but it didn't make a hundred million dollars. The Cable Guy got the biggest reaction, but Jim bore the brunt of it. The whole period was really good for me. I was able to write What Makes Sammy Run? and make Permanent Midnight.

[Q] Playboy: Both quite dark. What were the attractions?

[A] Stiller: I got the script for Permanent Midnight about four or five months after Cable Guy. I read it immediately and it was the most unusual thing I'd gotten as an actor. It was totally different from anything I'd done and I was physically right to play the part. I also loved what the movie was about: a guy struggling with his demons---in this case, addiction. But Jerry was not a typical addict in the way you see portrayed in the movies.

[Q] Playboy: What was different?

[A] Stiller: He was a funny guy. A comedy writer. Even though I wasn't an addict, I could connect to his problem.

[Q] Playboy: Did you try heroin to prepare for the part?

[A] Stiller: [Laughs] No, though that would be the cliché, actorly thing to say.

[Q] Playboy: And now Jerry Stahl is one of your best friends.

[A] Stiller: I got to know Jerry nine months before we shot the movie. The first time I sat down with him we bonded. By the end of the lunch we were talking about writing What Makes Sammy Run? together. I mean, we didn't even know each other and I suggested it. [Pauses] In some way I feel we were meant to come together as friends. Jerry is very much like the older brother I never had. He's also very much an adult, my first adult friend. He's been through a lot. The friendship has nothing to do with the movie. It's more important than the result of the movie, and that's the cool thing about it.

[Q] Playboy: Stahl once said that you've had plenty of your own deep pain.

[A] Stiller: [Yawns] Well, whatever. You figure out whatever you can connect with. Deep pain? I don't know.

[Q] Playboy: Tell us about your dark side.

[A] Stiller: That's all bullshit.

[Q] Playboy: So Jerry Stahl was kidding when he told a writer that your childhood was akin to Kafka being raised in show business.

[A] Stiller: That's funny [laughs]. Everybody has childhood pain. You know, I feel bad for anybody who's had to read any crap about me. This supposed dark pain is not a clue to who I am. Yes, there's pain. But so what? There's good stuff, too. I go back and forth on it. I've been in therapy, I've been out of therapy. I'm not in therapy now. I think it's good to examine those issues, but it's also dangerous to get caught up in it.

Once when I was away at camp, I was feeling homesick and my dad came up to hang out with me for a few days. He's that good a guy. He said, "That which does not kill me only makes me stronger." When you're suffering through that harsh Hidden Valley Camp summer---that cushy camp---it really helps.

[Q] Playboy: What are the advantages of being a show business kid?

[A] Stiller: I grew up in New York, not Hollywood, so I was exposed to more reality. But I thought it was cool. In fact, I loved it. It seemed much more interesting than what I was doing in school. In retrospect, the only reason I wish my parents hadn't been in show business is that, growing up, I would have paid more attention to what was in front of me. Show business kids never bond with real kids because show business is more interesting. It's important as a kid to socialize within your age group.

[Q] Playboy: And you didn't?

[A] Stiller: Let's just say I had an awkward adolescence and not a great high school experience. I had long hair and it grew out really big and a lot of times I wore a baseball cap.

[Q] Playboy: Did it bug you that your parents weren't around much when you were young?

[A] Stiller: They were there; it's just that sometimes they weren't. I can look back and pick it apart, but in truth they were very supportive. My dad bought me a camera and editing equipment. He took me to gymnastics classes and piano lessons, and weird art fairs. When they weren't around it was because they were making a living, though they often took us along. I've probably been too hard on them. The older I get the more I think, Hey, give 'em a break! [Pauses] It's a weird thing to talk about when everybody knows your parents.

[Q] Playboy: What's your dad like?

[A] Stiller: Everybody loves my dad. He's very quiet, soulful, spiritual, contemplative. He's not the screamer he played on Seinfeld. He was always there for me. Once, when I took acid in high school, I freaked out. I wasn't hallucinating or anything. It just threw me off and my fear kicked in. So I called my parents, only they were in California. I got my dad on the line. He had no concept of what acid really was, but he knew I was afraid, so he said, "When I was 10 years old, I smoked a Pall Mall cigarette and was sick for two days, so I know what you're going through."

[Q] Playboy: Which parent talked with you about sex?

[A] Stiller: Neither.

[Q] Playboy: How did you learn?

[A] Stiller: Playboy [laughs]. Those issues just weren't dealt with. My mother had a strict Irish Catholic upbringing with the nuns, and she didn't know how to approach it. With my dad, it's just an issue we never really talked about.

[Q] Playboy: When are you most a Stiller and when are you most a Meara?

[A] Stiller: I saw a gesture I did in Keeping the Faith, when I was getting angry and yelling, that reminded me of my dad so much. I was pushing my head forward.

They both read a lot, but Mom is an avid reader and more analytical and very sharp. She has a very good sense of humor. She's open-minded. Interested in metaphysics and spirituality. She just gave me this book, The Seat of the Soul, by Gary Zukav. She's also into quantum physics. She's fascinated by things like Schrödinger's cat. She loves to read biographies, too. She's more connected to culture and pop culture. My dad reads books about cabala. I think it was Madonna who got him into it. Not really.

My dad is also very interested in politics and current events. He reads the front page of The New York Times first, and my mom reads the Arts and Leisure section. I alternate.

[Q] Playboy: Were your comic idols Jewish or Gentile?

[A] Stiller: Woody Allen, Albert Brooks---and some non-Jews like Bill Murray and Steve Martin. I hate being categorized by my religion or my ethnicity. People ask if my humor is Jewish, but I've never looked at it that way. Of course, I took a job playing a rabbi in Keeping the Faith, so that invites questions. But it wasn't like, Oh, this is my chance finally to play a rabbil I liked the character. He was committed to what he did, but it wasn't like being in The Chosen.

[Q] Playboy: Are you knocking Robby Benson?

[A] Stiller: Oh, no. I love Robby Benson. One on One, Ice Castles.

[Q] Playboy: In a love scene in Keeping the Faith you roll on top of Jenna Elfman and we see your back hair. What did you think when you saw that on-screen?

[A] Stiller: When Albert Brooks pretested Modern Romance, the studio said, "What about the back hair? You've got to get rid of the back hair." He said, "What about the movie?"

[Q] Playboy: How do you rate yourself as a screen lover?

[A] Stiller: I don't. I don't even get into that. Of course not. Are you kidding?

[Q] Playboy: Come on.

[A] Stiller: It's like any other scene. You're just trying to be as real as you can in that moment, and not think about the time when you have to sit in a room later and answer the question, "How do you rate yourself as a screen lover?" In fact, the next time I do a love scene I'm going to have to block out this conversation and what happens on the other end, because that can really screw you up when you're naked in front of a bunch of strangers.

[Q] Playboy: How much of your on-screen lovemaking technique do you bring from home?

[A] Stiller: Not too much, I hope.

[Q] Playboy: Who would you like to direct in a love scene?

[A] Stiller: Nobody. I don't want to have to tell anybody what to do naked. I've done a couple of sex scenes, and they're not fun. Everybody gets stressed out. You're in a room with lots of people, trying to pretend you're alone---and you're naked!

[Q] Playboy: But you've been with Jenna Elfman, Catherine Keener, Maria Bello and Elizabeth Hurley. How bad can that be?

[A] Stiller: I've never met an actor who says, "Yeah, let's have fun and do some love scenes."

[Q] Playboy: Speaking of great sex, you once said you didn't want to get to walk down the aisle with a six-foot-two blonde just because you got your dick stuck in a zipper. Weren't you even a little tempted to take cheap advantage of your suddenly higher profile after There's Something About Mary?

[A] Stiller: By the time that movie happened, those temptations were already there. It wasn't the first time people said, "Oh, you're famous." I knew I could get laid [laughs]. But I find it shallow to be with girls who want to sleep with you because they've seen you on TV or in the movies. It's fun and exciting for a short time, and then it's depressing and you get resentful because it's not like you got better-looking or funnier or smarter. And to tell you the truth, by then I was ready to get into gear about what I really wanted to do with my life. I wanted to move past that stuff and have a family. I think there's just so much of being single a guy can stand.

[Q] Playboy: Just how much is that?

[A] Stiller: In order to be the kind of productive person I want to be, I'm better off not going out. I was never good with that stuff anyway. I was very insecure growing up. I'm still insecure, but for better or worse, my sense of self has always been associated with what I do creatively. I don't mean acceptance from the outside, either. I just feel better when I'm working---as you know.

Of course, part of me enjoyed being single and going out with different girls. I don't think of those experiences as mistakes. But another part of me got down on myself because my parents have been married for 45 years, and I know I'm much happier when I'm in a committed relationship.

[Q] Playboy: And now you are, having recently married. Any surprises? Any insights?

[A] Stiller: I've been married for three weeks, so I don't know. Talk to me in a year [smiles]. But I will say this: I'm still going, "Wow, I'm married. This is it, I'm married!" And there's nothing different about it in terms of how the relationship works every day, except that you have a commitment to being together, which is great. Every time you get into any sort of fight, it's never, "Well, fuck it. Fuck it! Maybe this isn't meant to be." Instead, you go, "Well, I'm not going to get divorced over how the suitcase is going to be packed, so maybe I better figure out a way to reconcile this with her." Marriage constantly pushes you toward a positive solution, because that's the only choice.

I've found someone I am really comfortable with. I can be myself and now I have this wonderful freedom to go from there. This relationship is so worth it because it feeds everything else in my life. My creative process is connected to Christine. I respect her sense of humor and she makes me laugh, which is one of the things I'd never really experienced before. It's great.

[Q] Playboy: Your wife played Marcia in The Brady Bunch Movie. Did you watch that show as a kid?

[A] Stiller: A lot. Also, I Dream of Jeannie.

[Q] Playboy: Explain the appeal of The Brady Bunch.

[A] Stiller: For me it was 180 degrees opposite of how I grew up. I also loved how it looked: the suburban house, the early-Seventies LA look.

[Q] Playboy: Did you have a crush on Marcia Brady?

[A] Stiller: Nothing major. I was more into Barbara Eden, Jeannie. She was the ultimate guy fantasy. She called Larry Hagman "Master" and did whatever he wanted her to do. When you're a kid you're like, "Wow, that's incredible! That's what I want! Can he have sex with her? I bet (continued on page 160)Ben Stiller(continued from page 78) she has to have sex if he tells her to have sex, because she's his genie." I think that's the secret appeal of that show. I also think Larry Hagman is a very good comedic actor. Later, he kind of took a turn, but on Jeannie he does very broad comedy as a straight man. I loved that show. I also loved Star Trek, of course.

[Q] Playboy: The original?

[A] Stiller: Yeah. I never continued on with the spin-offs. And I'm not really into other science fiction. I just loved that show and the characters. Obviously there's a kitsch level to Star Trek now, but I was entertained. Also, there was a certain comfort because it was always on in syndication, and it was always the same.

[Q] Playboy: Who did you identify with?

[A] Stiller: Captain Kirk [chuckles]. It's always frightening to analyze one's identification with Star Trek, but I thought he was cool. The William Shatner style of acting is unique. I like actors who put themselves out there and make big choices. I don't think you can get precious about acting and what entertainment is. Part of acting is committing fully to whatever you're doing. Some think this TV stuff is bad acting, but it's not. Guys like Shatner and Hagman are very committed. I'm often just as entertained watching them as I am watching Sean Penn, who I consider the best actor of his generation. You can't argue with something if it's funny or if it appeals to you. It's a guilty pleasure.

[Q] Playboy: Speaking of guilty pleasures, what's the key to your relationship with Janeane Garofalo? You guys are like the Mulder and Scully of-----Do you want to fill in the blank?

[A] Stiller: Of canceled TV shows. I tend to work with a lot of the same people. Janeane's probably the most obvious.

[Q] Playboy: The book you wrote together reveals that you had a two-minute relationship. True?

[A] Stiller: It's mostly made up.

[Q] Playboy: Mostly? So maybe you made out a little?

[A] Stiller: [Smiles] We did. We had a little thing at one point. A short little thing. Very short.

[Q] Playboy: Do you want to rate her as a kisser?

[A] Stiller: She's great!

[Q] Playboy: Clue us in to her technique.

[A] Stiller: No! It was too long ago. I can't remember. It was years and years ago. We had a professional infatuation with each other. We were turned on by each others' sensibilities. It was a, uh, comedicsensibility attraction more than anything else. She also has the most incredible laugh of anyone I know. It's one of her greatest qualities. She laughs at the right things and laughs profusely. A great sense of humor is so attractive in a woman. And she's smart. And beautiful. And fearless. She'll do anything. Well, she does have fear, but she'll still do anything. Janeane's also very guarded. She doesn't let that many people in. A lot of guys have a thing for her, though.

[Q] Playboy: So it seems. What makes her tick?

[A] Stiller: I don't have the secret. She just reminds me of myself a lot. What I admire about her is that she has a stronger sense of sticking to her principles. Her defenses are up, and rightfully so, when it comes to the press and the bullshit of show business.

[Q] Playboy: You mean the flak she takes for supposedly being Miss Alternative yet appearing in so many mainstream movies?

[A] Stiller: I don't think she's wrong to be that way. It pisses me off when somebody gets on her about that. What do you want her to do? She's an actress. That's the perfect example of how the press puts a label on somebody. Janeane never put a label on herself and said, "This is what I am and this is what I am not." She just says what she wants to say and does what she wants to do. God bless her for being in so many movies, of whatever kind. Yeah, sure, we've all made movies we would rather not have made. But at the end of the day we are actors, and the way you act is to get in a movie. I'd much rather see Janeane in 35 movies, where some are bad, than see her in three movies because she's so precious. I think that's wrong. By the way, I've done 29 movies, and I've probably done more bad ones than she has.

[Q] Playboy: What would make Janeane incredibly happy?

[A] Stiller: A boyfriend who could keep up with her. Also, if she could perform when she wants to perform and work only with people she thinks are incredibly talented.

[Q] Playboy: Why did you and Janeane think you could write Feel This Book, your book about relationships?

[A] Stiller: Having had many failed relationships, I thought I could have fun with that. Also, to me it was more about the self-help-book world, not relationships. The Tony Robbins, Wayne Dyer guys. I actually enjoy those kinds of books. And when I enjoy something, the first thing I want to do is figure out a way to do something funny with it. That's always been my instinct. Even when we did The Ben Stiller Show, the people we did parodies of were always people I was a fan of.

[Q] Playboy: Which Tony Robbins book stays with you?

[A] Stiller:Awaken the Giant Within. I'd seen his infomercials and then I did an impression of him on The Ben Stiller Show in a take-off where he helped you get over a relationship. He saw that and sent me his book, with a letter saying, "I think it's funny. It's great. Live with passion. Your humor, while incredibly humbling-----" It was such a perfect Tony Robbins move, which is to take somebody who's doing a parody of him and turn it into this positive thing and make me his friend. It was so endearing. I was like, Wow, he loved it. I have that letter framed, in my office.

[Q] Playboy: Are you close now?

[A] Stiller: We don't hang out, but we stay in touch. Four years ago I did The Tonight Show and did an impression of him. Then he popped up from behind the couch. He got in on the joke. Any time I've done a movie where there's a sound bite of his we want to use, he always gives permission. It's very easy to make fun of people who do what he does, but I also see a lot of positive stuff.

[Q] Playboy: Do self-help books really help, or do they hurt because you hate yourself even more when you realize you can't or won't do everything the books tell you?

[A] Stiller: They work if you want to make them work for you.

[Q] Playboy: Which have helped you?

[A] Stiller: A couple. [Hesitates] Talking about this (a) sounds ridiculous and (b) kind of takes away from the person---in this case, me. It's a personal thing. I don't want to open it up and take away from what it means to me.

[Q] Playboy: So it's not The Melrose Place Companion?

[A] Stiller: [Smiles] Wow. You actually hit on the one that has affected me most in my life. That and The Ultimate Friends Guide.

[Q] Playboy: If God gave you a magic eraser, how would you clean up your résumé?

[A] Stiller: [Pauses] I'd like to publicly apologize to Yakov Smirnoff. When we did The Ben Stiller Show pilot, a sketch was rejected at the last minute by the studio and we needed to fill in. We came up with the idea of lampooning Yakov Smirnoff. His comedy was based on having left Communist Russia and saying how wonderful America was in comparison. You know, "What a country!" But the Communists had fallen, so what was he going to do onstage then? The sketch was entirely too long, entirely too mean and not really in the spirit of the humor I would like to represent. I've read my share of nasty things about me. So, I'd like to apologize to Yakov. I mean that. I'd hate it if somebody did that to me.

[Q] Playboy: You didn't like it when, on the set of The Cable Guy, Matthew Broderick imitated you as a troll.

[A] Stiller: Right [laughs]. I'm never thrilled with that. That's one reason I feel lucky that The Ben Stiller Show got canceled so quickly. At some point you really don't get spiritual fulfillment out of making fun of other people, even if it's done lovingly.

[Q] Playboy: Bad karma?

[A] Stiller: It's more about it not being fun to wait for someone else to do something creative so I can parody it. They're out there trying something new; I'm just making fun of it. Also, I don't think I could have kept up with the workload and still been good. I just can't imagine what it would have been like to do that show for five years.

[Q] Playboy: Everybody mourns its passing, except you.

[A] Stiller: It's amazing to me that people still talk about it. But not everyone loved it. I remember this horrible review by Tom Shales of The Washington Post. He hated it. I was really shocked when he suggested that my show was the result of nepotism. I was amazed he would actually believe that Jerry Stiller and Anne Meara could tell the Fox network what to put on the air and what not to. That he would think my parents have that much power in show business was hilarious. Rank on me all you want, but that's not how I got on the air.

[Q] Playboy: Would you get the old group together to do a special of new short films, maybe an annual reunion?

[A] Stiller: It'd be fun if anybody asked. I would be into it. Sketch comedy is such a strange thing. My show never had a mass audience like Saturday Night Live. Sometimes with the MTV Movie Awards or the VH1 Awards, I still get to do short filmed parodies. I just did one for the MTV Movie Awards this year, a Tom Cruise impression. He agreed to come in and we did the sketch for the opening, where I'm his stuntman. It's me and Tom doing improv, with me doing the impression to his face. It was the most bizarre experience for both of us.

[Q] Playboy: Describe the agony and the ecstasy of hosting an awards show.

[A] Stiller: It's fun, but ultimately a stand-up comedian's job. For an actor, it's great to have the experience of going out on a stage and being in front of thousands of people, but it's also something I would never want to do again. Hosting awards shows is like a weird dream, because it's not something I know how to get prepared for. You just try to be as loose as possible. You have to be. When Janeane and I hosted the MTV Movie Awards, we dropped in from the ceiling like Cruise in Mission Impossible. Frightening. We went together.

[Q] Playboy: The movie that you're directing now, Zoolander, is based on a character you did in a filmed short for the VH1 Fashion Awards. Why did you want to make it into a feature?

[A] Stiller: Modeling is such a ridiculous world, but it hasn't been shown on film in a way people can connect with. There have been documentaries, but I think a flat-out comedy is the way to go.

[Q] Playboy: Who is Zoolander?

[A] Stiller: Derek Zoolander is a fashion model. He's not very smart. He has three looks: Blue Steel, Ferrari and Le Tigre. They're basically all the same. [Demonstrates: Head goes one way, shoulders the other; wide-eyed sexy stare with pursed lips.] He also has one called the Magnum that he can't show because any time he does, whatever he's wearing becomes an instant trend because it's so powerful. The last time he did that look he was wearing painter's pants and rainbow suspenders, and sort of got in trouble for creating that bad fashion.

Derek's kind of at the end of his career---he's 30---and he's having a midlife crisis because he loses the Male Model of the Year award for the first time in four years, to Hansel, his rival. Derek has to rethink his life, and then he gets picked for one final modeling assignment and ends up being more involved than he realized. I think of it as The Manchurian Candidate or Parallax View with no brain [laughs]. And with lots of models.

[Q] Playboy: As consultants?

[A] Stiller: You can never have enough technical consultants on a movie like this, and I find that the female consultants seem to have much better insight. Plus, they're better to hang out with.

[Q] Playboy: What is Zoolander's sexual orientation?

[A] Stiller: We like to call him omni- or pan sexual. He's not bisexual, he's not gay, he's not purely straight. Sex with less than one person is a rarity for him. He's open. He doesn't even question it.

[Q] Playboy: Is there a female Zoolander?

[A] Stiller: No, but there's a hack journalist character doing a story on Derek for The New York Times Magazine. She hates models and thinks the industry is ridiculous. The story comes out with the headline Derek Zoolander, Stupidest Man On Earth. Then she ends up attracted to Derek and they have a little bit of a romance because Derek is kind of innocent, a simple guy with a huge ego who's very, very, very good-looking.

[Q] Playboy: Not that we're saying anything about your looks, but how do you act as good-looking as a male model?

[A] Stiller: Every shot in the movie will be computer-generated. No, you put on the wig and it's all in the attitude and the walk. Because Derek is 5'7"---a petite; most male models are at least six feet tall---he has plenty of attitude.

[Q] Playboy: Do you think you're a good-looking guy?

[A] Stiller: I, uh, no. The simple answer is no. Everybody has one or two angles where they go, Oh, I look OK like that. Then, when you see yourself in a picture you go, Wait a minute, that's not how I look in my head. As an actor I see myself on-screen, which is way more than anybody should see themselves. I'm constantly reminded of the fact that I look nothing like the way I look in my head.

[Q] Playboy: You sound disappointed.

[A] Stiller: No. Sometimes I'm fine with how I look. Sometimes I have major issues with my self-image. But I'm in a business---especially doing comedies---where I put myself out there and I'm reconciled to it. Otherwise it's too easy to get consumed with all that stuff.

[Q] Playboy: What's your best angle?

[A] Stiller: Looking out.

[Q] Playboy: Who would you pay good money to be mistaken for?

[A] Stiller: Hmm. That's a good question. So many choices [laughs].

[Q] Playboy: Make one.

[A] Stiller: Often it's anyone but myself.