Ringing in the New Year

YOUR RESOLUTION? THROW A PARTY TO REMEMBER

ANUARY1. IT'S IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHAT TIME IT IS, BUT IT FEELS LIKE MORNING. THROUGH A LIGHT HAZE, YOU REALIZE A NEW YEAR HAS ARRIVED, SURE TO BE FULL OF SURPRISES. SPEAKING OF WHICH, HERE'S YOUR FIRST-AND, PRAISE HEAVEN, IT'S A PLEASANT ONE. AS THE WOMAN LYING NEXT TO YOU COMES INTO FOCUS, YOU SIGH, REALIZING SHE'S THE ONE YOU HOPED WOULD BE THERE. SHE HEARS YOU STIR, AND HER LIDS BLINK OPEN. SHE RUBS HER FISTS INTO HER EYE SOCKETS AND SMILES.

"YOU KNOW WHAT?" SHE ASKS, ARCHING HER BACK IN A CATLIKE STRETCH. "WHAT?"

"THAT WAS THE BEST PARTY I'VE EVER BEEN TO IN MY LIFE."

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED. YOU'VE STARTED OFF 2007 WITH A BANG. IT'S TRUE; YOUR GUESTS WOULD HAVE NEEDED CROWBARS TO PRY THE SMILES OFF THEIR FACES LAST NIGHT. OF COURSE, THAT MUCH FUN DOESN'T HAPPEN BY ITSELF. YOU STARTED PREPARING MORE THAN A MONTH AGO, AFTER SUFFERING THROUGH A SOUL-CRUSHING THANKSGIVING PARTY. THE HOST IS A FRIEND OF YOURS, BUT IT WASN'T HIS FINEST HOUR. THE MUSIC WAS TAME, AND THERE WAS TOO MUCH FOOD, NOT ENOUGH BOOZE AND TOO MANY PEOPLE WEAR­ING SWEATERS. WHILE DISCREETLY SPITTING OUT A MID­DLING PIECE OF PUMPKIN PIE, YOU VOWED TO SHOW THEM ALL HOW IT'S DONE. YOU WOULD THROW A NEW YEAR'S PARTY FOR THE AGES. IT WOULDN'T BE EASY. NEW YEAR'S EVE IS A NIGHT BURDENED BY EXPECTA­TIONS THAT ARE SELDOM FULFILLED. BUT YOU HAD THE TASTE, THE STYLE AND THE GUEST LIST TO MAKE IT WORK. HERE'S HOW IT ALL WENT DOWN.

FOUR WEEKS OUT A party lives and dies by its guests, and compiling a great list is an art unto itself. You invited 35 and expected to get 25. the magic number at which a party remains intimate enough that you can talk to every­one yet big enough that many guests will be meeting for the first time. You made sure you had the basics covered: (1) more women than men. (2) a few talented raconteurs of the Truman Capote school to regale people with sto­ries of love, leisure and deceit and (3) a decent age spread for generational cross-pollination. Once the list was nailed down, you had the invitations printed. You wisely intuited that Evites are for toddlers' birthdays and karaoke night. A mailed invitation tells people this will be no half-assed affair.

TWO WEEKS OUT The menu came together. This being the holidays, orders had to be placed in advance to make sure plenty of caviar and Krug would be on hand. The name of the game was simple: decadent delicacies that require no silver­ware, elegant yet carnal. Eating with fingers stirs the primal instinct in anyone-think asparagus entering painted lips. ONE WEEK OUT You chose your outfit for the evening. Good thing you did: Your jacket needed a trip to the cleaners.

THREE DAYS OUT You bought the rest of the food and stocked the bar. leaving yourself a few days of slack in case you forgot something-which you did (bags of ice). Sure, you overbought a little for the bar. but better too much than too little: liquor and wine don't rot. A mixed case of medium-bodied red (say. a nice Valpolicella) and a white (Pouilly-Fume). plus three bottles of bourbon (Maker's Mark), scotch (Chivas) and vodka (Stoli) and two of tequila (Patron Silver), rum (Bacardi Superior) and gin (Beefeater). Beerwise. it was a case each of lager (Heineken) and dark brew (Negra Modelo). The champagne was a budget buster: you went with six bottles of the Krug Brut Grande Cuvee.

THF r»AY Rpcodp stocked up on ice. toilet paper and candles, then got to work on the music playlist. It took a couple of hours to shape the perfect accompaniment, building gradually from background music to full-on bumpage. but once you were done, you could feel your party in advance. And you liked it.

Put on a pot of coffee, cranked Ouadro-phenia and spent two hours cleaning your place. Tossed the champagne, beer and white wine into the fridge.

Quick drive to buy fresh French bread, then home to start prepping the food. Once the menu (see right) was moving, you set the place up. rearranging chairs, plants and ashtrays into a more crowd-conducive configuration. 3:OO P.M. Set up the nonperish-able bar fixings.

An hour-and-a-half disco nap. followed by a fresh pot of coffee and a few minutes with the Panthers and the Saints in week 17 of the NFL.

Showered. Cleaned the pipes. Brushed the teeth. Shaved the mug. Dressed. ,

Three friends showed ' up with takeout. Music went on the stereo, the bar was sam- M pled, and they helped with m

hors d'oeuvres prep.

The first guests arrived. And ah. there was Katje—a model from Russia who works part-time as a pri­vate detective, just for grins. Julia wasn't looking half bad either, in hip-hugging leather pants. Anna. Bridgett and Raquel.... "Feel free to leave your coats in the bedroom." you began, then added to no one in particular, "along with the rest of your clothes."

You started with liberal helpings from your bottomless well of charm and ambled about the scene with a

tray full of cigars and a dozen Ha-vana cocktails (a shot of light rum. a shot of pineapple juice and two

teaspoons of lime juice, shaken and strained into a chilled cocktail glass). 10:45 P.M. "You're a Truffaut fan. Katje?

No way. My favorite is Shoot the Piano Player, from the David Goodis novel. You like The Soft Skin? I've seen that one too. but...."

11:00 P.M. Strolled the premises again, with a dozen nnargaritas on a tray (one shot of silver tequila, half a shot of Grand Marnier and the juice of half a lime, plus a splash of wa­ter, over ice in a rocks glass with a wedge of lime dropped in).

Time to distribute the champagne glasses. And then the champagne.

11:58 P.r* Turned down the music to get everyone's attention. Positioned yourself next to Katje and breathed deeply. She smelled like an English rose garden in spring. You swore you saw a drop of sweat disappear into the valley of her cleavage.

Led the countdown, took in the roar of the crowd and. after rinsing your mouth with bubbly, planted your lips on Katje's. 12:01 A. Cranked the music to 11. Fatboy Slim will make anything with a pulse shake its groove thing.

.-.ww ,-..¦•. Made the rounds.

rDid a quick lap around the joint to make sure there were no fires. Found a bed for Eric and Jess (people's coats were getting wrinkled). Found a bucket for Guy.

"No, no. I like The Soft Skin. too. but there's some­thing about Shoot the Piano Player that kills me. Marie Dubois just inhabits Lena, and...." 1:00 A.M. Another round of cigars and Havana cocktails for the guests. You had trouble re­maining on your feet when Katje winked at you with a Cuban in her mouth. Whoa! A check of your watch—time to toss the cookie dough into the oven and get the sweets out.

Threw on the wind-down music—Astrud Gilberto followed by early Miles Davis followed by Chet Baker.

13:30 A.M. With Katje stashed in the bedroom, you told your guests you hated to call it a night and couldn't believe they had to go—but they really had to go. 3:5 "Your audience

with the Dalai Lama sounds amazing. Guy. Now get the hell out of my apartment."

Katje emerged

from your bedroom wearing

one of your dress shirts and a

pair of your boxers. You poured

her a glass of champagne and

put on Ella's "You Do Something

to Me." After a brief slow dance, she was ready to rock, but a gentle­man knows when to slow pedal. It was breakfast time, for goodness' sake.

The smell of portobellos and

tomatoes filled your kitchen, perfectly com­plementing Katje's rose garden. 4:15 A.M. Dessert.

SOMETIME THE NEXT DAY It's impossible to say what time it is. but it feels like morning. Through a light haze, you realize a new year has arrived, sure to be full of surprises. Speaking of which, here's your first—and. praise heaven, it's a pleasant one....

SPREAD FOR 25

HORS D'OEUVRES

5 LOAVES FRENCH

BREAD. SLICED 2 LBS. GENOVA SALAME

(FBOM VOUWOODS.COM)

3 LBS. PROSCIUTTO. WITH FINE SUCES BALLED

1 LB. EACH OF CRATER LAKE

BLUE. MONTGOMERY'S

CHEDDAR. FROMAGE DE

MEAUX AND HUMBOLDT

FOG GOAT

UU AVAIUBU AT ART1SANAICHEESE-COM)

3 LBS. CHILLED BLANCHED

ASPARAGUS. SALTED

TO TASTE

2 LBS. RAW BABY CARROTS 1

2 LBS. FRESH GRAPES OF

YOUR CHOICE

3 30-GRAM TINS STERLING

CLASSIC CAVIAR (FROM STERUNGCAVLAR COM)

3 LBS. CHILLED COOKED

FRESH SHRIMP (PIUS A BOWl FOR TAILS)

COCKTAIL SAUCE

(2 CUPS KETCHUP.

2 TSP. JARRED HORSERADISH.

1 TSP. WORCESTERSHIRE

SAUCE. JUICE OF ONE LEMON.

HEINZ CHILI SAUCE AND

TABASCO TO TASTE)

ENDLESS WATER CRACKERS

LOBSTER PATE

2 FRESH 1 V2 LB. LOBSTERS. BOILED

1 CUP CELERY. DICED 6 TBSP. MAYONNAISE

2 TSP. LEMON JUICE I DASH CELERY SALT

>/2 TSP. WORCESTERSHIRE SAUCE 4 TBSP. DRY SHERRY

Remove meat from the lobsters and cut Into quarter-Inch cubes, then

toss Into a Culslnart. Add the other Ingredients, pulse for 30 seconds,

season to taste and serve chilled next to the French bread.

TWO A.M. DESSERT

3 LBS. FRESH STRAWBERRIES WITH STEMS

BOWL OF CREME FRAlCHE PLATE OF FRESHLY BAKED COOKIES

LATE-NIGHT BREAKFAST FOR TWO

(recipe courtesy of Food 911 host Tyler Florence)

EXTRA-VIRGIN OLIVE OIL 4 STRIPS SMOKED BACON

2 SPRIGS FRESH THYME

2 ClOVES GARLIC, MINCED

I LARGE PORTOBELLO

MUSHROOM

I LARGE TOMATO.

CUT IN HALF <l2 CUP CANNED BAKED BEANS

2 FRESH EGGS 2 TBSP. CHOPPED CHIVES 2 SLICES THICK-CUT TOAST

Heat a large cast-iron pan over medium heat Add olive oil and bacon strips. The fat will render a little (If there's too much, remove some with a spoon). Add thyme and garlic Place mushroom facedown on top of fat In the pan

and add tomato halves facedown. Shake pan and season vegetables ^_ with salt and pepper. Cook for 3 minutes until bacon is crisp and §f

mushroom is tender. Tum the bacoa tomatoes and mushroom over ¦ and add baked beans to one quarter of the pan. Gently stir J them. Move It all over to make space In one quarter, then

crack eggs Into the pan. Cook for 1 to 2 minutes.

When eggs are done, remove pan from heat and

garnish with chopped chives and freshly

ground black pepper. Serve in pan (don't let Katje bum herself on It!) with thick-cut toast y on the side.