Paul Rudd

THE CLUELESS STAR TALKS ABOUT MAKING OUT WITH JESSICA ALBA AND MICHELLE PFEIFFER, DEFENDS HIS FEUD WITH COLDPLAY AND SPINS A HILARIOUSLY WARPED FANTASY ABOUT AL PACINO

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Q

PLAYBOY: In the biblical comedy The Ten. your character is in a love triangle with Jes­sica Alba and Famke Janssen. Isn't that like picking between a bundle of cash and a slightly bigger bundle of cash? RUOD: Yeah, that's really a win-win situa­tion, isn't it? It's funny, because that wasn't even the part I was supposed to play. I origi­nally had another role, but because it's an independent movie and the cast was so big and the director was trying to figure out all the schedules. I ended up working with Jessica out of circumstance. She could shoot only on certain days, and the role of her lover hadn't been cast yet. so I ended up switching parts to do it. It wasn't such a bad consolation prize. I made it seem as though I was being a team player for the film, but deep down I was plotting and scheming to do those scenes with Jessica.

PLAYBOY: You also have a supporting role in Judd Apatow's recent film Knocked Up as a husband in a loveless marriage. Did that make you more or less optimistic about your chances of making your marriage work?

RUDD: At times it felt as if we were film­ing a documentary. My wife would keep a checklist of things about me that piss her off. and she'd say things like "Oh. here's one for )udd: Pick up your fucking coffee cups!" That's the kind of marriage we have. We can talk openly about how the other person drives us absolutely crazy. It gets a little awkward for a while, but then we see it in a movie and we can laugh about it again. I think that's ulti­mately what it means to be in a healthy, good relationship, [long pause] But seri­ously, we're doomed.

Q

PLAYBOY: In / Could Never Be Your Woman. you play a 20-something guy who is pursued by an older woman. Did you take the role because you believed in the project or for the chance to make out with Michelle Pfeiffer? RUDD: A little of both, actually. She's def­initely one of the most beautiful women on the planet, and there were times dur­ing the shoot when I'd stop myself and think, They're paying me to kiss Michelle Pfeiffer. What the hell is going on? I must have really good karma. I must

have saved some puppies from a burning building in a previous life or something. On the very first day of shooting we did a scene in which both Michelle and I are in our underwear, and I'm straddling her and taking pictures of her with my cell phone. That was day one. It was amazing and a little uncomfortable.

Q

PLAYBOY: We understand the amazing part, but how was it uncomfortable7 RUDD: I don't care if you studied at Yale or what kind of theatrical training you may have, there is no way you could not be.... I don't mean in a crude way. but it was just like. "Oh my Cod." You know what I mean? I'm not sure if I should say anything else. It was a very cool first day at the office, let's just say that.

PLAYBOY: / Could Never Be Your Woman is your second film with Amy Heckerling. who directed you in your breakout movie, the teen comedy Clueless. You've gone from playing a guy trying to have sex with his younger (continued on page 126)

PAUL RUDD

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stepsister to a guy trying to have sex with somebody older. Does that feel like a step forward or a step back? RUDD: It's a pretty obvious leap forward, don't you think? Kind of a natural pro­gression. What's left? Necrophilia, I guess. It'll be like The Sixth Sense, but I'll be saying, "I fuck dead people." Either it'll be a big hit or it'll ruin my career. I suspect the latter.

Q

playboy: You spent most of your child­hood in Kansas City. What's your favor­ite thing about K.C.? RUDD: I really like Kansas City, and I go back there whenever I can. I have a theory about that city: At any time, you can turn on the radio in Kansas City and hear "Bad to the Bone" by George Thorogood. And I'm not even throwing out a random reference to be funny. It's like living in a time warp. "Bad to the

Bone" is something that keeps the city alive. It's our musical sustenance.

Q

playboy: Aside from the obvious safe-sex methods like condoms, do you have any tips on avoiding an unwanted pregnancy? rldd: Besides avoiding sex altogether? Because I think that's almost 100 per­cent effective. Well, let me think. There's the proper Christian answer, which you don't hear a lot but I think is mentioned somewhere in the good book: If you're worried about getting pregnant, try anal sex. That should do the trick. They don't tell you that at Bob Jones Univer­sity, but it's true.

Q

playboy: You worked as a DJ and an MC at bar mitzvahs. and you became famous for something called the Donnie the Dweeb dance. Please explain yourself.

rudd: Oh God. That happened after a particularly long day. I was doing back-to-back, bar mitzvahs, and I think I just hit the point of no return. 1 was losing my mind, and I just started dancing, mocking my own job. It was this awk­ward dance move where I stuck my ass out in a weird way and just Hailed my arms around. It was so popular that my boss said I had to keep doing it because the kids were always asking for it. It was just awful. And to make an embarrass­ing story even more embarrassing. I was about 20 years younger than most of the guys who did this kind of thing for a liv­ing. But I was the "hip" I)J. All the other DJs wore tuxedos, but I wore shorts and Doc Martens because I thought they made me look like Angus Young from AC/DC. And I had really long hair. I thought 1 was cool-looking, but now I realize I wasn't in any way cool. I actu­ally looked like Yahoo Serious.

Q

plavbov: Your first film was 1992's/l Ques­tion of Ethics, and you used the screen name Kenny Chin. Were you that unsat­isfied with the finished product? rudd: That's a really horrible story too. It was my first acting job out of college, and I was told it was an industrial film for schools or something. On the last day. we shot a scene in which my character realizes the error of his ways. After we finished it, the producer came over and said, "That was great, but let's try an alternative end­ing." They gave me the new script, and it was all about being saved and "Thank God I've made the right decision, because otherwise I would have been going to hell"—really hard-core born-again Chris­tian stuff. So I said, "I'm not comfortable with this, because I'm Jewish." And they said, "Well, you're an actor. Act like you're born-again." I was so green and naive. I felt as though I'd been tricked into being in a Christian film. I finally told them I wouldn't say it. It was the only time I've ever said no to a director. They released the movie anyway, and I asked them to use the name Kenny Chin.

Qm

playboy: You almost didn't get to use Paul Rudd as your professional screen name, because another actor was using it. How did you finally win your own name? RUDD: The first Paul Rudd retired from acting not long after I got into the busi­ness. He was a respected actor in New York during the 1970s, and he was happy to give the name to me. He actually wrote me a letter, and it was really nice. He asked if I had a son. People ask me all the time if he's my father, but we're not related at all. I'd love to meet him, though.

Q i

playboy: During your first few years as an actor, you did some staggeringly awful

movies, such as Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers. Is there one movie you still look back on and wonder, What the hell was I thinking?

ki Di): Well, there are plenty of stinkers in there. But they were all enriching and worthwhile episodes in my life, and 1 value them all in different ways. The Halloween sequel seemed like the most humiliating choice at the lime, but I got to talk on set with Donald Pleasence about Harold Pinter plays. I mean, how cool is that? At the time, though, I was really upset. I look back at it now and I love it. It helped me become a little less precious and pretentious.

Ql

playboy: How much does Los Angeles depress you?

RUM): I have many good friends who are completely centered and normal, and they love living in Los Angeles. But when you're in the entertainment industry, there's this complete saturation, and I didn't want to be surrounded by it all the time. I was born in New York and always had an affinity for the East Coast. I don't think it's normal to live anyplace where it's 70 degrees and sunny all the time. Many people think it's paradise, but it's fucking hell to me. I'm not kidding. "Don't you hate the cold in New York?" Absolutely. That's why 1 live there. Because when it gets warm, I feel pleasure in ways you don't understand, Mr. Santa Monica. You have to go through the shit to appreciate the good.

Q

playboy: Even when your film career began to take off, you continued to per­form on Broadway. But unlike a lot of movie actors turned theater thespians, you've never done full-frontal nudity. Why have you refrained from flashing your junk on the Broadway stage? ki nix I've often said I'd like to do a play in which I'm totally naked, but each and every time the director and the cast have insisted I put clothes on. A few times I was fired from a production because I did a full-frontal nude scene at the very first perfor­mance and they said it was inappropriate. I'll tell you, the cast of You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown has regretted it ever since. [laughs] In all seriousness, I'm pretty care­free about stuff like that. If it were some­thing classy, I'd show the old D&B. And by D&B I mean, of course, "dick and balls."

Q

pIj\yboy: You've also dabbled in quite a bit of Shakespeare, such as Baz Luhrmann's adaptation of Rovieo ami Juliet and a 1998 stage production ot'Iwelflh Night. Are you drawn to Shakespeare for the integrity or as an excuse to wear tights? RUM): I wear tights in everything, even if you can't see them. I actually like Shake­speare plays because they're some of the most incredible stuff ever written. I just

love being able to say those lines. If you know what you're saying, the effect it can have on an audience is just divine. And the tights are a little bonus, a cherry on the top, if you will.

Q

playboy: Let's talk about your real pas­sion—auto racing. This past February you competed in the Cadillac Super Bowl Grand Prix and lost to Leanne Tweeden. Was that a blow to your ego? Ri'DD: Hell, no! My goal was actually to come in last place, honest to God. I wasn't even sure if I wanted to do it, but when I found out it was a charity event for the Make-A-Wish Foundation, I couldn't say no. The race was early in the morning and I was hungover, and some of the celebrities who took part were weirdly hard-core about it. They came in early just to test out the track. 1 was like, "Dude, come on! It's for Make-A-Wish!" So I thought I'd just drive as slowly as I could and come in last. "Hey, look at me! I get to ride in a fun little car!"

Q16

playboy: A few years ago you were asked to return to your alma mater, Shawnee Mission West High School, to talk to the drama students about acting. What kind of advice did you give them? rum): I honestly don't remember what I said. I was probably drunk. I didn't get up there and pontificate about life in the theater or anything like that. 1 mostly just answered their questions as seriously as I could, believe it or not. I told them—and I firmly believe this—that if you really want to be an actor, you should do a play. Because more than acting school or classes, you're going to learn everything you need to know just by doing a show and doing it every night for the entire run. And then I said, "Well, I've got to go now. I'm needed on another multibillion-dollar Hollywood movie set. I'll see you later at the craft-services table. Oh, wait, I guess I won't."

playboy: You did an exaggerated imita­tion of Al Pacino's Scarface character in the Reno 911! movie. If you ever run into Pacino, do you owe him a debt of grati­tude or an apology?

rcdd: First of all, thank you for recogniz­ing that it was purposely awful. I haven't run into Pacino since shooting that film, but even if 1 tried getting in touch with him, I don't think he'd return my calls. He's still pissed off about Anchorman because my character was a blind guy who was always saying, "Hoo-wah!" You may not know this, but we started out together in New York in the late 1970s. It was him and me and Bobby D. and Marty. We lived together in a studio apartment in Hell's Kitchen, back when we were all still struggling. Here's the weird thing about Al: It could've been 90 degrees, and he'd still be wearing a scarf. But that

was Al. Sometimes Gene Hackman would come by, and let me tell you, that guy can stink up a bathroom. We had some great times. We'd perform monologues for one another, or we'd go out and race our motorcycles up and down Ninth Avenue.

Q

plavbov: You do realize the math doesn't work out, right? During the late 1970s you were only eight or nine. RUDD: Yeah, I know. Anyway, I'll never forget this day back in 1978. I was hung-over, and I woke up next to Angie Lans-bury. During the fevered dementia that some people call pillow talk, she looked over at me and said a two-syllable word that forever changed my acting life. She said, "Hoo-wah!" Al must've heard us and decided to steal it. Because origi­nally it was my catchphrase! It was mine! [laughs] 1 honestly hope people read this and don't realize I'm kidding. And I especially hope Al Pacino reads it and says, "Who the fuck is this guy?"

Q

playboy: During your many visits to Conan O'Brien's talk show, you've plugged your latest projects by using the same clip from a 1980s movie called Mac and Me, in which a character in a wheelchair rolls off a cliff. Do we sense a bit of film envy? RLDD: I'm impressed that you picked up on that. Well, for one thing, Mac and Me is just a fantastic film. I've seen it many times. I think it's just so bizarre and funny to use the same clip over and over again. I'm surprised Conan let me do it

so often. Some people who work at the film companies have been upset with me. When you do these talk shows, you're supposed to be promoting something, but I just feel like such a jackass. Does seeing a clip on a talk show convince anyone to go out and see a movie? It wouldn't convince me, unless that movie was Mac and Me. But my tastes run a little different from the norm, I suppose.

Q20

playboy: In The 40-Year-Old Virgin, your character claims that watching the same Michael McDonald video over and over caused him to have a nervous break­down. You also suggest that enjoying the rock band Coldplay is enough to qual­ify somebody as gay. Do you have any regrets about dissing them? Ri'DD: A little bit. I think Michael McDon­ald appreciated the joke, and I've heard he dedicated a song to me at one of his concerts. But Chris Martin, the lead singer of Coldplay, apparently didn't think it was as funny. And in all honesty, that bummed me out. There are many bands that are much more gay than Coldplay. You would never guess this from some of the movies I've done, but I don't like jokes that put down other people unless they're really asking for it. Like Hitler. I don't feel bad about making a Hitler crack, because, let's face it, he was kind of an asshole. But oth­erwise I try to stay away from anything too mean-spirited.

/ had really long hair I thought I was cool-looking, but I actually looked like Yahoo Serious.