Sex in America

7hIS YEAR AMERICANS WILL ARGUE ABOUT pni ICY & PHILOSOPHY

BUT ONE THING WE WON'T FIGHT ABOUT IS SEX

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culture in Amer- are still being waged, but the sex wars are just about over. Sex has won. ^^ Fifty years

ago threesomes met on golf courses, gay meant "happy," and a divorce all but dis­qualified a man from seek­ing elected office. Ricky might have loved Lucy but not from the same bed, and Rob and Laura Petrie had Ritchie, but one won­ders how. Sex was never discussed. It was not until the end of the 1960s, long after the invention of the pill and playboy magazine,

that Americans were able to see Mr. and Mrs. Brady snug­gle in the same bed. How times have changed.

It's hard to believe, but people who were newborns when Mike and Carol Brady first turned off the lights together are today's 39-year-olds. They grew up in an era when all the Friends characters, male and female, showed an interest in porn, and neither Will nor Grace felt any shame about having an active sex life. Twenty years from now, when those same people are nearly 60, they will look back on the time in which their parents were raised—a time when books were banned, elders forbade premarital sex and talk of contraception was forbidden—and they'll laugh in the same way we mock the modest bathing suits and caps of the pre-bikini 1940s.

Today in America there may seem to be little or no consensus on matters of policy or politics. The coarseness of the dialogue has turned politics into a contact sport and participants into gladiators. But according to playboy's exclusive nation­wide Politics of Sex survey, all you have to do is change the subject from what happens on Capitol Hill to what happens between the sheets, and the political chasm is bridged by unexpectedly similar sexual views. Social and cultural issues still divide us by gender, age and race, but on that most intimate of personal issues we are surprisingly united. This suggests the rather heretical notion that if political partisanship is our national curse, sex may be the cure. Has the end of one revolution marked the beginning of another? Instead of "Make love, not war," today's slogan could be "Let's stop arguing and go to bed."

Let's look at the numbers....

Our national survey of 900 randomly selected adults ages 18 to 64 paints a vivid picture of a nation much happier in bed than in the voting booth.

There's no denying Americans are having sex—lots of sex—often with more than one partner (often at the same time). Almost half of all adults (47 percent) report having sex at least once a week. In fact, more people under 40 have sex at least once a week than vote for president once every four years.

Speaking of quantity, nearly a quarter (23 percent) of Americans have taken part in a threesome. So next time you're bored during an office meeting, look around the room and guess which one out of every four co-workers has crossed a menage a trois off his or her sexual to-do list. And don't assume the one who wears the what would jesus do? bracelet hasn't. More than half (55 percent) of the people who attend church every week consider themselves to be "sexually adventurous." The myth of the chaste churchgoer is just that—a myth.

Pornography? Congress may battle over its availability and the Supreme Court over its definition, but half (51 percent) of all Republicans and two thirds (67 percent) of all Democrats have watched it with their sexual part­ners. As it turns out, women (regardless of political party) are more likely than men to have watched porn with their partners (66 percent of women versus 57 percent of men). And speaking of partners, one quarter of all Republicans (25 percent) and a third of all Democrats (35 percent) have had more than 10 sexual partners (in their lifetime, not all at once). Those are higher percentages than vote in some congressional and local elections.

One reason Democrats have more sexual partners may be that they lose their virginity earlier than Republicans—but not that much earlier. Almost a third (31 percent) of GOPers report waiting until they were 20 or older to engage in

sex, compared with 23 percent of Democrats, but that also means the majority from both parties aren't waiting until their wedding night or even high school graduation. Are parents really surprised?

Could this emerging statistical parity among Americans of both political persua­sions suggest we are in the midst of a red state-blue state sexual renaissance? And how many presidential candidates can even spell renaissance? Now there's a ques­tion for the next presidential debate. But I digress....

Henry Kissinger famously said, "Power is the ultimate aphrodisiac," and he was

right. Only 57 percent of Americans would definitely say no to a one-night stand in the Oval Office with a president they found physically and sexually attractive. In fact, 23 percent of all Republicans and 24 per­cent of all Democrats would definitely or probably say yes. (Question for the next poll: How would the numbers change if the assignation were to take place somewhere other than the Oval Office?)

Note that in our question we asked about a president the respondent found "physi­cally and sexually attractive." Apparently, these terms do not mean the same thing. Americans of both parties say they are

more turned on by intelligence than by physical appearance. Bill Clinton says as much when he talks about the "success" of his 32-year marriage: "I still would rather spend the night talking to her than anybody I can think of." Ponder the implications. People obviously have their figures of fantasy, but at some point most of them prefer someone who can balance a checkbook—or wants to be president. Even among 18- to 29-year-olds—the group in the sweet spot of its sexually active years—40 percent rate intelligence as more of a turn-on than physical attractiveness.

Lest you take these indications of sexual enthusiasm to mean morality in America is dead, our survey also revealed that values are alive and well in the 21st century. We asked our participants seven questions to reflect the so-called seven deadly sins (lust, gluttony, greed, sloth, wrath, envy and pride). While only eight percent

of us would claim absolute purity, just 25 percent of the population consider themselves guilty of committing four or more of the deadly seven. The chief cause of transgression? Pride. A whop­ping 84.7 percent of respondents admit they have succumbed to it. The other weaknesses people will confess? Greed, envy, wrath, sloth, gluttony and, in last place, surprisingly, lust. Go figure.

For the most part, sin is gender neu­tral. Just as many men are willing to admit to their shortcomings as women. Nor is household income, education or race a meaningful barometer. Age, on the other hand, is the primary indica­tor of "sinfulness." Nearly half (41 per­cent) of Americans between the ages of 18 and 29 admit to committing four or more of the seven deadly sins—three times as many as their parents' genera­tion. One wonders if this is the result of a different kind of upbringing or if age brings a kind of moderation that cools the various passions. Or perhaps older people are just big fat liars.

Still, some lines are starkly drawn. Consider adultery. Do most people find it acceptable to take a little break from routine and have a quickie with someone other than their spouse? The answer is an emphatic no. When offered the opportu­nity to participate in sex outside an exclu­sive relationship, with the guarantee they would never be caught, only one in five Americans say they would "probably" or "definitely" consider taking the chance to see if the grass really is greener on the other side of the fence.

But here's where politics and adul­tery get interesting. The 2008 presi­dential matchup everyone is praying for pits current New York senator Hil­lary Clinton against former New York City mayor Rudolph Giuliani. Both candidates have faced issues of infi­delity in their marriages, and both are aggressively seeking the support of active churchgoers who publicly reject that sort of behavior. When offered the chance to participate in an extramari­tal affair, with the same guarantee of not being found out, Clinton supporters are more averse to the idea. More than two thirds (70 percent) say they would probably or definitely not break their vows. By comparison, only 56 percent of the supporters of the thrice-married Giuliani feel that way.

Speaking of infidelity—or rather, speaking of speaking of infidelity—Bill Clinton certainly offered a memorable contribution to The Big Book of Immor­tal Presidential Quotations when he said, "I did not have sexual relations with that woman." After all the political hearings and attempted apologies, the phrase may be undying, but America would definitely not agree with its assertion. Clinton's defiant finger-wagging denial

aside, an overwhelming 84 percent of Americans believe oral sex is sex. Even 81 percent of those voters who support Hil­lary Clinton—and who may be thought to have supported Bill Clinton during his tribulations—believe oral sex is sex. In fact, the only segment of respondents who even remotely believes otherwise is younger voters. A third of them (34 percent) think oral sex is more like necking or petting than intercourse.

Sure, there are some partisan

sexual differences. Though both

parties say they consider brains to

be more of a turn-on than brawn (or

breasts), Democrats are more likely

than Republicans to be turned on by

wealth (maybe because they don't

have it). Republicans attend church

more often than Democrats, but

they also have sex more often.

Republicans more sexually active than Democrats? Who'd have thought? This should come as good news for a party that has lost the House and the Senate, is precariously close to losing the White House to a woman as popular as cholera in some circles and is laden with leaders who can no longer be trusted to visit air­port men's rooms or interact with students in the congressional page program. From Manhattan to Malibu, these are the worst of times for America's Repub­licans. Yet something must be going right for GOP devotees. A resounding 36 percent are "very

satisfied" with life overall, compared with just 23 percent of Democrats and 23 percent of independents, in fact, Republicans are among the most satisfied segments of the

American population. Could the explanation lie between the sheets? Our poll shows that

55 percent of Republicans—yes, the party of the religious right—have sex at least once a week, compared with just 43 percent of Democrats. In addi­tion, Republicans are more satisfied with their sex life than Democrats are. No longer does the most significant difference between the parties have to do with what people believe but rather how often they act.

Sexual conservatives, take note: The people who are most satisfied with their sex life are most likely to call themselves sexually adventur­ous. While the phrase It's time for a change may be most often applied to politics, it also has important uses in the bedroom. And it is spoken equally by Republicans and Democrats—and by women almost as often as men. And speaking of women....

Obviously sex appeal never hurts a candidate. Some say John and Bobby Kennedy, Bill Clinton and, this year, John Edwards and Barack Obama owe their popularity to an appeal far more basic than their positions on nuclear nonproliferation. No woman at the center of pub­lic life has been able to strike a chord in quite the same way. Based on our survey, Michelle Obama has the most sex appeal. She's the top choice overall, as well as among Democrats and women. In second place is Condoleezza Rice, who owes her strong finish to men older

than 50, married men and voters from the South. A close third is first lady Laura Bush, the primary pick among Republicans. (There's something to be said for the retiring, well-read librarian type.) And what about the former first lady? Though Hillary Clinton has sexual cachet among Democrats—she finishes number two after Michelle Obama—she comes in a distant fourth overall.

At the end of the day significant differences on major issues remain. From Iraq to immigration, we are a highly polarized and very argumentative nation. But in how we live our life, what we want for the future and what we do behind closed bedroom doors, we're all a lot more alike than you may think. The playboy Politics of Sex poll proves the disparity is far smaller than our perception of it. The lines between black and white are becoming gray as fast as the lines between red and blue are turning purple.

ASKED WHAT QUALITY IS A TURN-ON. 47% OF CLINTON SUPPORTERS CHOOSE INTELLIGENCE. JUST 36% OF GIULIANI SUPPORTERS AGREE.

INDEPENDENT RESPONDENTS AVER­AGE 11.4 SEXUAL PARTNERS, DEMO­CRATS II AND REPUBLICANS 9.3.

ON AVERAGE. REPUBLICANS SAY THEY WERE 18.4 YEARS OLD WHEN THEY FIRST HAD SEX. INDEPENDENTS WERE 17.6 AND DEMOCRATS 17.5.