46 things you never knew about call girls

Americans have learned one thing from Spitzer-gate—aside from the fact that the man was a two-faced moneybags who wanted to get caught—it's that we are living in a golden age of the call-girl business. Escorts appear on CNN and the Today show, talking candidly about their work. "What's next?" commented one writer post-Spitzer-gate. "American Escort, in which a dozen hookers demonstrate their talents in front of a panel of celebrity judges?" Not 10 years ago the idea of paying for sex conjured images of desperate women and roadside motels. The Internet has changed all that. The web has lubed the channels between supply and demand. The result is a swelling population of not so shady women choosing the oldest of professions, with a huge population of moneyed men willing to pay for their services. Right or wrong? Our governors and attorneys general will decide as soon as they've finished banging their high-priced dates. Meanwhile here's everything you ever wanted to know about call girls 2008.

1. ESCORT In today's world an escort is a call girl

2. TER The Erotic Review, a nationwide Za§at-like website, on which call girls are rated by their clients. Escorts are described down to the minutest detail, from physical descriptions to their most intimate predilections. Example: The 10 most recent reviews posted for escort Cina Rollins ($500 an hour, ginarollins com) all give her a 10 out of 10. Gina's

about five-foot-five, fully shaved below and "one in a lifetime."

3. SPITZER, 1/(1) To overpay an escort for services rendered, as in "Dude. $4,300? You totally spitzered."

4. ON SKIRTING THE LAW The disclaimer listed on one escort-agency website: "Because we are an upscale agency, we expect our clients to understand the nature of companionship services and will not answer any obscene type of questions. Money exchanged in legal adult personal services for modeling is simply for time and companionship. Anything else that may or may not occur is a matter of personal choice and personal preferences between two or more consenting adults of legal age and is not contracted for. nor is it requested to be contracted in any manner."

5. HOBBYIST A guy or gal who has fre­quent dates with escorts. 6-16. ESCORT LINCO: FIRST CUP The first time a John comes. FS Full service, as opposed to a hand job or blow job.

RELEASE Ejaculation arising from manual stimulation

INCALL You come to her. OUTCALL She comes to you. CREEK WELCOME Escort is willing to do anal. CIM Come in mouth. COFCome on face. cob Come on body. DFK Deep French kissing. DINNER DATE A four-hour meeting.

17. "IT'S LIKE ANY OTHER JOB. YOU HAVE YOUR GOOD DAYS AND BAD DAYS."-Sally, a New York-based escort

18. ESCORT ETIQUETTE Courtesy of The Playboy Advisor If an escort shows up at the door and doesn't match the photo you saw online or otherwise doesn't meet your expectations, the standard advice is not to let her in. Keep in mind that if you send an escort away, you will hurt her feel­ings. If you do let her in. put the money in an envelope so she can see it, and leave it on a table. Don't bring it up.

19. TIPS Yes. you should tip.

20. CFE Girlfriend experience, the degree to which an escort can make you forget she is being paid for her services. Among call-girl connoisseurs. CFE separates the broads from the babes

21. "I GET PAID TO ALWAYS WANT COCK, ALWAYS HAVE GREAT HAIR AND NEVER

REVEAL MY pms."-CS . a Los Angeles-based escort

22. GOTCHA Among the political big shots snagged in escort scandals in recent years: Dick Morris. CIA number-three man Dusty Foggo, the state department's top foreign-aid advisor Randall Tobias. California congressman Randy "Duke" Cunningham. President Bush's younger brother Neil. Louisiana senator David Vit-ter, Massachusetts congressman Barney Frank, pro-Bush website writer (and gay call boy!) Jeff Cannon. California congress­man Ken Calvert

23. "I DON'T PAY THEM TO HAVE SEX WITH ME. I PAY THEM TO LEAVE."-Charlie Sheen

24. SPITZER. 1/(2) A legal term that applies to a public official who breaks a law for which he himself crusaded, as in "Your Honor, my client's spitzering has already caused his reputation enough damage."

25. ON ENTRAPMENT Are you a cop7" he asks. "No." she answers. So he's home free, right? Wrong. Undercover cops can lie about their identity; otherwise, they would rarely be able to make arrests and in some situations they would find themselves in danger. Legally, a police officer can't lead you to commit a crime you would not otherwise have commit­ted. But if you are arrested for soliciting a decoy, you'll have a tough time arguing in court that you were suckered. Other falla­cies are that money has to change hands and clothes have to be removed.

26. VICE-COP HUMOR A story from a New jersey detective. We set up stings where I would wear a wire, meet the girl and have my backup team in another room. When the girl asked me if I had any special requests. I would tell her that I wanted to call her Irene because that was my ex-girlfriend's name. Irene' was really the tip-off to my backups to storm the room and cuff the girl. One time I had the girl, and right before she thought she was about to give me a blow job I said. 'Oh. Irene.' Nothing I said it again Noth­ing. I screamed it. and by now the girl is grabbing at me. The girl is chasing me. and I'm shouting Irene!' I thought my wire was busted until my backups came into the room, laughing their asses off. Fuckers got me good."

27. DON'T BELIEVE EVERYTHING YOU SEE

Take the beauty at sharonluxury.com. listed as a 24-year-old Italian available for 1.500 euros a night. The girl in the pho­tos looks a hell of a lot like Venezuelan supermodel Aida Yespica. What a strange coincidence! Superhot Alexis at alexis deluxe.com. a "Swedish model" avail­able for 1.000 euros a night? Hmm. Her photos look just like Italian model Maddalena Corvaglia's...

28.THEW0RLD'SM0STEXPEN-SIVE ESCORT According to our research, it's Jet Set Lara (jetset blog.com): $12,000 for a full day. though she'll have an introductory lunch with you-just lunch-for $6,000

29. TOP FIVE HOTTEST CALL GIRLS PORTRAYED ON THE

SILVER SCREEN (5) Elizabeth Taylor as Gloria Wandrous in BUtterfield 8. (4) Nicole Kid-

man as Satine in Moulin Rouge!. (3) Kim Basinger as Lynn Bracken in LA. Confidential. (2) Jane Fonda as Bree Daniels in Klute. (1) Elisabeth Shue as Sera in Leaving Las Vegas ("You can fuck me in the ass. You can

come on my face. Just keep it out of my hair I just washed it").

30. TAKE CREDIT? High-end escort ser­vices often mask credit-card transactions so an innocuous name shows up on the statement, such as "Gotham Steaks." used by |ason Itzler (the self-proclaimed King of All Pimps) before the cops shut down his agency. NY Confidential.

31-33. ON THE BLOGOSPHERE:

CONFESSIONS OF A COLLEGE CALL GIRL (C0LLEGECALLGIRL.BL0GSP0T.COM) Pained

yet sarcastic entries illuminate what makes a call girl tick. Endearing and at times incredibly sexy. BELLE DE|OUR (BELLEDEJOUR-UK.BLOGSPOT .COM) High-class London call girl describes her liaisons, often in explicit detail. It reads like fiction, but-of course-no self-respecting hooker would ever lie. so it's certainly all true.

A NEW YORK ESCORT'S CONFESSIONS (NYH0TTIES.COM) It's exactly what you think it would be. One recent blog begins. "Scrotum scrotum scrotum scrotum scro­tum scrotum. Vagina vagina vagina vagina vagina vagina. Scrotum vagina scrotum vagina scrotum scrotum scrotum." Ger­trude Stein would be proud.

34. INDUSTRY STANDARD Fifty percent goes to the girl. 40 percent to the agency. 10 percent to the booker (a sales rep of sorts)

35. INDEPENDENT A call girl who doesn't want to split the cash and advertises her services sans agency. The Internet-specifically Craigslist and any of the

"escort malls." such as eros-guide.com-has made going independent the trend.

36. escort fashion "So how should you dress as an escort? You want to be able to walk into a nice restaurant or qual-

ity hotel and blend in. Dress like a professional businesswoman. While you do want to look sexy. your keywords in choosing clothing and makeup should be elegant, classic, respectable and wholesome... To make up for your camouflaged exterior, your undergarments should be hot and sexy'-Turning Pro: A Guide to Sex Work for the Ambitious and the Intrigued. by Magdalene Meretrix

37. THE CAR Debuting in 1981. the Escort quickly became the Ford Motor Company's top-selling model both domestically and worldwide Sixty-nine pavement-shredding horsepower!

38. £6,400 The amount in cash an ex-aide to a Saudi-born arms dealer claimed he handed over to Heather Mills (later McCart­ney) to have sex with his boss (No surprise, she "strongly" denies the allegations.)

39. TALK ABOUT TURNING TRICKS If you

call an escort agency, chances are you'll get whoever s available. An escort may play the

role of Tina at $500 an hour. Betty at S350 and Succu­lent Suzanne at $1,000. all in one weekend.

40. JFK WAS QUITE THE

JOHN His liaisons included international call girls Suzy Chang. Maria Novotny. Ellen Rometsch (an East German Communist) and ludith Campbell Exner. also

a plaything of Chicago Mob boss Sam Ciancana. Exner served as an intermediary between the White House and the Mob.

41. "I OFFER A WARM-OIL EROTIC BODY RUB USING MY HANDS, ARMS. CHEST, CHIN, TONGUE AND WHOLE BODY. I AM ALSO VERY ORAL.... I ALSO INCLUDE TONS OF BODY CONTACT AND TEASING INTO MY MASSAGES. I DO OFFER MORE TRADITIONAL SERVICES AS WELL. IF YOU ARE INTERESTED, PLEASE SEND ME AN E-MAIL!" Sound hot1 You've just read Aaron Edwards s home page on allmaleescortscom

42. LUNCH SPECIAL A discounted rate an escort may charge for a midday tryst.

43. ON PRICING The more somebody pays for you. the more they'll respect you. Tell a guy you're $100 and they'll treat you one way. Tell them you're $1500 and they'll treat you better. I've heard a lot of girls saying. Is this girl getting $5,500 an hour because she's more beautiful1 Is she doing some­thing I don't1' The answer is no. But that girl is able to look a guy in the eye and say This is what I'm worth, and this is what you have to pay if you want me.' And you have to be able to do that and believe it."-Ava Xi'an, escort quoted in The New York Times

44. IN JAPAN Call girls are called deri heru. meaning delivery health." They offer such varied services as kokku sokkingu (cock sucking), kuni sabisu (cun nilingus) or A-zeme (anal attack)

45. WHY DON'T MORE ESCORTS GET BUSTED? (1) Some cops are on the make, so to speak; (2) It costs the state an average of $2,000 to prosecute a woman on prostitution charges

46. SPITZER, V{3) To request "bare­back" sex (no condom) from a call girl, as in "I spitzered her. but she was like. Duh. not a chance, pal"