The Playboy Bar: Rum

THE JUICE ON THE JUI

f Slaves on 17th century Caribbean sugar plantations didn't have easy

lives, bolt's not surpTTsTrunney Touna a way to dull the pain a bit by distilling fermented molasses (a by-product of sugar production) into what they called kill-devil. The earliest mention, from a 1651 logbook entry, describes it as a "hot, hellish and terrible liquor." Which it undoubtedly was, but that didn't stop Caribbean pirates from getting ripped to the tits on the stuff, burning villages to the ground and sailing back to Europe with hulls full of gold and booze. By the 18th century rum was the most popular liquor in the Colonies, with thousands of distilleries tucked among the whorehouses of New England's port towns. Business waned during the 19th century, but after Prohibition rum made a comeback. We now consume more of it than any other country, but only in the past decade has there been a stable of widely available connoisseur-level rums. We figured it was high time to salute the preferred hooch of sailors, beach bums and anyone else with devils to kill.

WHITE RUM

Often referred to as light or silver rum, this subtle, sweet and clear spirit is the foun­dation of most rum-based cocktails. White rum is typically aged for a short time in un-charred oak casks or stainless-steel tanks. This liquor comes cheap, but we suggest you spend the extra 10 bucks for Platino Matusalem ($32).

GOLD RUM

This category is some­times referred to as amber, but either way, the rums in it spend a few years in charred bourbon barrels, which impart the eponymous gold color while blunt­ing the spirit's inherent sweetness. It has a slightly more robust flavor than white and is used mostly for mak­ing mixed drinks. See Bacardi Gold ($13).

SPICED RUM

A category that emerged in the mid-20th century, spiced rums are gold ones that have been infused with various flavors, most commonly cinna­mon, vanilla, caramel and a variety of fruits. You can find some real clunkers in this aisle, but you're safe in the hands of Sailor Jerry ($20) or the ubiquitous Captain Morgan ($19).

DARK RUM

Dark rum is aged at least three years in heavily charred oak barrels and carries a complex flavor profile that can rival your bet­ter whiskeys. The extra aging mellows it out and brings the sweet­ness back. Though it can be mixed, it's best sipped neat, on the rocks or with a squeeze of lime. Try Cruzan Single Barrel ($25).

SUPER-AGED RUM

This relatively new category includes hooch that has been in the barrel even longer, usually for five or more years, to bring out more flavor. Though it can be produced from a single spirit, more often than not it is a blend of oldies but goodies. Mount Gay's 1703 Old Cask Selec­tion ($100) is a good place to start.

FOR HIM: THE BLACK PRINCE

(Created by Philip Ward of New York City's Death + Company) 2 oz. Ron Zacapa 23 rum % oz. Punt e Mes

(or another Italian dry vermouth) V2 oz. Averna

(a black herbal liqueur) 1 dash orange bitters Stir ingredients with ice and strain into a chilled cocktail glass.

FOR HER: THE ACAPULCO

IVi oz. light rum

IVi oz. triple sec

1 tbsp. lime juice

1 tsp. sugar

1 egg white

1 mint sprig

Shake all ingredients (except mint)

with ice, then strain into an ice-filled

old-fashioned glass. Garnish with

mint sprig.

FOR THE PARTY: FISH-HOUSE PUNCH 8 cups amber rum 4 cups brandy 4 oz. peach brandy Vh cups superfine sugar 8 cups water 4 cups lemon juice Pour sugar into a large punch bowl along with just enough water to dissolve it. Add lemon juice, all liquors and the remaining water, then stir and refrigerate for at least an hour. Add a large block of ice, , garnish with lemon slices and serve.

ANY QUESTIONS?

Why is rum called rum? The ancient Malays had a cane-based booze they dubbed brum, though many etymolo­gists contend the word derives from either rumbullion, a West Indian term for "a great uproar," or the goblets Dutch sailors used, called rummers.

Was George Washington as big a boozer as people say? We cannot tell a lie: For his inauguration ceremony Washington had rum specially imported from Barba­dos. He was also rumored to request eggnog and rum punch on a daily basis.

Plus, thanks to those wooden teeth, he has the distinction of being the only founding father who could barrel-age liquor inside his own mouth. Is it ever acceptable for a man to drink a frozen rum cocktail? According to Tom the barman, our local font of un­impeachable booze wisdom, it is ac­ceptable on three conditions. You must be: (1) outside and (2) with a beautiful woman who is (3) also having one.

Would the United States exist without rum? Probably, but it wouldn't be as

much fun. Actually, a tax on molasses was part of what riled up the colonists about taxation without representation. Considering that most of our nation's forefathers owned muskets and were dearly attached to their liquor, some­thing was bound to give.

What is Black Tot Day? July 31, 1970, the day Britain's Royal Navy ended its centuries-old practice of handing sailors a daily ration (or tot) of rum, leaving them, sadly, with only sodomy and the lash.