Ribald Classics

The Featherless Nightingale

What? You have never heard of that prince of birds, that paragon of creatures, the nightingale without feathers? You do not know that ladies find his song much sweeter, his beauty more splendid, than those with the gayest of plumage? Then listen:

When Lizio of Romagna was quite old, his wife bore him a daughter who grew up to be the loveliest and most charming young lady in those parts. Her name was Caterina. Lizio guarded her diligently against the advances of the local blades.

One of these blades, however, went unsuspected by the old man, even though he often visited Lizio's home, for he was the son of an honored family and was treated as a member of the household. The young man was called Ricciardo and he was as handsome as Caterina was pretty, so it was not surprising that a strong attraction sprang up between them.

This went unvoiced for some time, for Ricciardo was fearful of offending Caterina and Caterina did not wish to appear forward. At last, however, the boy's desire loosened his tongue and he blurted out:

"Caterina! Do you want me to die for lack of love?"

"No, indeed," she replied. "But how may I save your life and my reputation at the same time? Father insists that I sleep with Mother every night."

This was truly a problem, but Ricciardo answered, "Your father, noble man, guards you well. Yet if you could persuade him to let you sleep out on the balcony, you might save me from being consumed in my own fires."

"I will try," Caterina promised.

That evening, while the girl and her mother were sewing in the mother's chamber, Caterina stopped to fan herself, breathe heavily, and say, "How insufferably hot it is, Mamma!"

Since the weather was cool, her mother was surprised at this observation, and said as much.

"Ah, Mamma," objected Caterina, "you know full well that the blood of young girls is far warmer than older matrons'. To me, the night is hot."

"I am sorry," said her mother. "But nothing can be done about it."

"Nothing? Why may I not make a bed on the balcony? It would be much more comfortable there, and the nightingale who sings in the garden would lull me to sleep."

"I will speak to your father, but I'm sure he will not agree to it."

The lady was right. Lizio would not hear of such a thing. That night, Caterina tossed and turned in bed so much that her mother could not get a wink of sleep. In the morning, the lady said to her husband, "For goodness' sake, let the girl sleep on the balcony. I could not live through another night like the last."

"Very well, very well," grumbled Lizio. "Prepare her a bed out there and let her listen to the confounded nightingale to her heart's content."

And so it was done. A curtained bed was moved onto the balcony that night and Caterina, attired in her prettiest nightgown, climbed into it and pretended to sleep. As soon as she was sure her mother and father were sleeping, she signalled to the waiting Ricciardo below. He, with some difficulty and danger, but spurred on by his great love, climbed up upon the balcony and was soon in Caterina's bed. She was overjoyed to receive him, and after exchanging uncountable kisses, she removed the nightgown and saved his life. Indeed, had Ricciardo possessed nine lives like a cat, the generous girl might have saved them all.

But life-saving is exhausting work and the two young people fell fast asleep after a time. Caterina slept with a smile on her lips and her hand on the staff of life.

Alas for them! Their sleep was so long it lasted until daybreak, and so deep they did not hear the approach of Lizio who went out upon the balcony to see how his daughter had fared during the night.

Drawing aside the bed-curtains, he found Caterina and Ricciardo still in the position in which they had fallen asleep. Though his rage was boundless, Lizio said nothing. He went directly to his wife's chamber and roughly shook the sleeping lady.

"Awaken, wife," he cried, "and see how the nightingale has lulled your daughter to sleep!"

"What are you saying?" she asked.

"I say arise and see how your clever girl has caught the nightingale in her very hand!"

"How can that be?" the lady marvelled. "No nightingale will allow himself to be grasped in that way."

"Say you so? Then come and learn, foolish woman, that of all nightingales, the one without feathers may indeed be caught thus!"

The puzzled lady arose and followed Lizio to their daughter's bed, and as he held aside the curtains, she saw that what he said was true. Feeling Ricciardo had betrayed their trust, she was about to rail at him, but Lizio silenced her.

"Say nothing. Things ill begun may sometimes turn to good. Reflect: Ricciardo is of a rich and ancient family. Has our daughter shown a fondness for the nightingale? So be it! Let her have it often, then--in holy wedlock."

Suddenly the lovers awoke. Caterina let loose the nightingale. Ricciardo prepared himself for the death stroke of a righteous father. But when they heard Lizio's proposal, they rejoiced and almost leaped from the bed, naked as they were.

"No, do not rise," smiled Caterina's mother. "You doubtless can use a few more hours' sleep."

Thus did things end happily for Caterina, Ricciardo, and their families.

And the nightingale? He was happiest of all.

Ricciardo climbed into her waiting arms.