Editor’s Note: This relationship feature on romantic compatibility is written by Playboy Club Creator Aubri Ebony.

Before you commit to another Valentine’s Day, it might be important to ask yourself, “Am I compatible with this person?” Don’t know how to decide? Well, don’t worry! Your fave Playboy Club Model & Mental Health Professional, Aubri Ebony, is here to help.

PLAYBOY Magazine is back! Preorder your copy HERE

Let’s talk compatibility! Compatibility, put simply, is when two people can function together harmoniously and maintain a fulfilling connection. It might be a good idea to agree that you’re actually able to function healthily with someone before celebrating the big love day together. 

You might think they’re hot and good in bed, but let’s get deeper for a moment and focus on just compatibility. For starters, I want you to think about compatibility in seven areas: Communication, Lifestyle, Faith & Spirituality, Health & Wellness, Intimacy, Family & Emotional Support. Let’s do a quick breakdown, shall we?

Communication

Lets think about conversations between you and your person. Is one person terrible at communicating how they feel? Or is one person great at clearly communicating how they feel? Just because you have different ways of communicating doesn’t mean that you’re incompatible. But if the person who is great at talking wants the person who’s not so good at talking to communicate a bit better, then “Houston we may have a problem.” Communication is key, so make sure you feel safe and secure in how you communicate to your partner.

Lifestyle

Now, I’m a girly who likes the finer things in life, so it’s hard for me to think of being with someone who doesn’t want the same lifestyle. We wouldn’t be compatible. Think about your partner. Are they minimalistic and match your vibe, or do they want something that isn’t you? You may want to test your compatibility there. And if you’re willing to compromise on your compatibility there, that’s okay too. Balance is key.

Faith & Spirituality

This one strongly depends on the person. Ultimately, if you share the same faith as your partner, you are most likely are compatible in that area. However, if you’re not much into religion or faith and you meet someone who is, it’s important to create space for both worlds, or you may be incompatible in that area. Compromise is key in this area or, you may want to look at your compatibility level here.

Health & Wellness

I love when my body looks exactly how I want it to, because I’ve been in the gym and I love a man who’s fit. I can honestly say I wouldn’t be compatible with someone who isn’t into fitness or doesn’t value health and wellness. Now, that’s not to say a gym go-er can’t vibe with a couch potato, but the compatibility there would be important to look at in the long term. What are your specific goals? Do your goals match their goals as to how you see health and wellness in your future together? Talk it out. 

PLAYBOY Magazine is back! Preorder your copy HERE

Intimacy

Really, I mean sex. Are you reserved? Do you value someone just as reserved? Are you kinky and want someone just as kinky? Are you kinky and looking for your Anna? Or are you Anna looking for your Christian Gray? Either way, it’s about communication and intimacy is an easy place to grow. Just talk, touch and play.

Family

We all have one. Unless we’ve completely cut ours off for drama. How important is family to you? Are you distant and okay with that? Are you a weekly caller? A dinner every weekend with the parents person? What about your partner? Do you want them to be family-oriented? Or match your distant vibes? It’s also important to make sure your goals for family align. Do you want 10 kids and they want none? Have the convos and be clear on your goals.   

Emotional Support

This is a big one. Emotional support is key for a successful relationship. Some people handle all their problems alone, while others talk everything out with their partner. Finding a balance here is key to ensure compatibility in how you as a couple tackle emotional support. If you keep things to yourself and your partner wants you to open up, does that work for you? Or, if you share so much that your partner never gets the opportunity to speak on their issues, do you think there is a healthy balance?

Final Thoughts

Overall, compatibility is a great way to gauge how likely the relationship is to work. It can cover different areas not discussed or even bring clarification on some of the ways your partner behaves that you may not be aware of.  

No one has time to waste. If you’re spending Valentine’s day with someone you see a future with, using these compatibility points could help you see if the relationship is going to a place where you want it to. If you’re there for the moment and just want to enjoy yourself and a little late night special, then that’s okay too. Ultimately, do what is best for you and don’t forget… safe sex is great sex.

Aubri Ebony is on The Playboy Club. Talk to her now.