One minute, you and your lover are eating delivery Thai food while watching “Love Island.” The next, you’re both eating burrito bowls and tiramisu at the dinner table while talking about who you’ll separately bang this weekend.

While the thought of even asking your partner to consider converting a monogamous relationship into an open relationship sounds terrifying, it’s worth considering — if you’re into that.

The definition of an open relationship is one in which both partners have agreed to have romantic or sexual relationships with others outside their primary relationship. One of the ways that such a relationship style can succeed is through a blended cocktail of equal parts honesty, communication and mutual consent. Without those ingredients, it’s just cheating.

Usually these relationship styles are established as open either before the couple gets together or early into their relationship. To open it up mid-swing is a whole ‘nother ballgame.

Unlocking an Open Relationship

Before you even think about asking your partner if you both could open the relationship, ask yourself how you feel about it. Would you be able to still maintain a healthy relationship with your partner? Can you handle knowing your partner could be making deep and meaningful physical and emotional connections with others? Some things can’t be undone.

With that in mind, communication is the first step in your unlocking journey. You and your partner must discuss everything — desires, fears and fantasies. Be honest, be vulnerable and be patient.

Does it sound like your partner is considering it? Next up is discussing and establishing boundaries. Similar to guardrails on a fun rollercoaster, they keep things exciting without veering off the track. Discuss everything from exclusivity to the level of detail you want to share about your outside adventures.

Remember, opening a relationship isn’t about replacing your partner — it’s also about enhancing your bond. You’re both exploring new avenues of intimacy, trust and even jealousy.

Know your limits, your triggers and your non-negotiables. Be prepared for unexpected emotions, and don’t be afraid to seek support from friends, therapists or online communities.

Opening a relationship is a big step, but it can also be incredibly rewarding. With open minds, open hearts and open communication, you and your partner can create a new fulfilling dynamic.

Open Intention: Physical Disconnect, Emotional Interest

One man on Reddit’s r/ sex community said he was “at a loss” after his fiancé who “lost interest in me physically” and told him she wanted to open their relationship.

“My (m30) fiancé F(29) has lost interest in sex and physical intimacy of any kind since i proposed a couple years ago. She still expresses emotional care for me (says she loves me etc.) But pulls away whenever i try to initiate physical intimacy of any kind,” u/ UnableLettuce1253 wrote.

The OP said his fiancé asked if they could open the relationship “so she can try sleeping with other people.”

“I let her know that there was no way i was comfortable with that, and that if she wanted to explore beyond our relationship she would have to do that without me. She acted like this was a personal attack against her and got upset, ending the conversation,” the OP wrote.

Redditors supported the OP en masse and many recommended that he end the relationship.

A bucket of wisdom: “Um … end it. She’s gaslighting you. Why would SHE get offended by you NOT wanting to share her with other men? She wants her cake and eat it, too. She wants the emotional security of being with you while being able to fuck around. That’s a hard pass,” u/ RepulsiveEngineer599 wrote.

Short and true: “I’ll keep this very simple. Once one member of a relationship wants an open relationship, that relationship is over,” u/ InfiniteDate6288 wrote.

A true question: “why in the world is she still your fiance?” u/ helpdad73 wrote.

Some tough, possibly truthful love that explains her reaction to him saying no to opening: “Sounds like she is already cheating. This relationship is dead, time to give it a quick burial and move on,” u/ backchatting wrote.