As much as we are here to champion equality at PLAYBOY, it would be ignorant to assume all is such, especially when it comes to relationships. It can be confusing to navigate any relationship, whether new or many years along. That said, dating coach Elsa Moreck is here to help men better understand how to communicate and commingle with the opposite sex.

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Throughout years of dating consulting, Elsa — who is a published author on the subject (see below) — has built an expansive digital following of nearly 335,000 users across Instagram and TikTok. To up the ante, she has a busy year planned for 2025.

Read along this relationship mogul sits down for an enlightening conversation with PLAYBOY’s Gabriel Santiago.

PLAYBOY: Let’s start at the beginning—where were you born & raised?

Elsa Moreck: I was actually born in Indianapolis. I’m from Indiana. My parents aren’t from there; they’re both ethnically Lebanese. I grew up all over the world. From Indianapolis, we moved to Georgia when I was eight. Then, we moved back to our home country of Lebanon when I was 11—my parents were terrified of me being what they called a “traditional American teenager.” From Lebanon, we moved to Japan, and I spent seven years there. I learned to speak Japanese and was partying it up in Tokyo.

When I went to college, my dad was secretly hoping that I would meet a nice Lebanese guy at a university in Lebanon, and that did not work out. I dated Lebanese guys, and it never really led to anything. At the age of 22, graduating university in Lebanon, I moved to Europe for a little while. I took a gap year and then I moved to Austin, Texas, which is where I’ve been ever since!

PLAYBOY: What inspired you to start doing content creation in the dating space?

Elsa Moreck: Interestingly enough, I never thought I’d be a dating coach, but I think the signs were always there. In high school, I would get in trouble all the time with my mom because I would be on the phone late hours into the night giving my girlfriends dating advice. I had a knack for it.

I was a huge nerd growing up, and didn’t really start getting male attention until I was a freshman. Before that, I was basically invisible to boys, but I understood the social game. I was really, really good at helping my girlfriends get what they wanted. From there, I was kind of a tomboy in college. I had a lot of guy friends who were also struggling with women and they would come to me for advice and I would tell them exactly how things were going to play out, and they usually did!

Once I graduated university and was trying to figure out what I wanted to do with my career, I had several friends reach out to me and thank me because they got married because of something I said to them, or they dumped someone finally because of something I said to them once! I didn’t really connect the dots right away—I just knew that I wanted to start my own business.

PLAYBOY: Tell me about your book Dating for Men: A Guide for Attracting Women.

Elsa Moreck: It really changed the trajectory of my career. Before this, I was a dating coach for women and I was really good at it. I really enjoyed it. But one day, I was approached by a publisher and was asked to write a dating book for men. I was terrified at first, but it was an interesting take and I ran with it. Because so many of my girlfriends were also single and I use them a lot for data and research, I just basically was like, “Would you guys mind answering some questions for me so I can write this book for men?”

So, I interviewed over a hundred women between my coaching practice and friends to essentially write this book for men. When the book came out, I obviously had to promote it, so I started posting on TikTok as an experiment. I started making dating videos for men and my second video ever went viral! It got over 100,000 views within an hour of posting it.

The book did really well, so I made the complete switch to working with just male clients. Since then, my career has kind of exploded. The floodgates have opened since I’ve pivoted to helping these men.

PLAYBOY: How can one easily improve their flirting skills?

Elsa Moreck: I think that so much of flirting is having fun. Often, men and women get so in their own heads about the impression that they’re making on the other person that they forget to have fun. And when you are trying really hard to come off a certain way to someone, you’re not going to flirt. So what I find a lot of people do is they treat flirting in a very linear fashion.

Most people don’t flirt. They approach a date like an interview, but you’re not just there to tick off a checklist; you’re also there to figure out if you have chemistry with that person. Can you have fun with this person? Can you banter with this person?

PLAYBOY: On the opposite side of that, what are the top three things men do these days that give women the “ick”?

Elsa Moreck: I’m not a crazy fan of the “ick” concept. I think that people have gotten way too merciless when it comes to dating. People can be so unforgiving and so judgmental. We all do or say icky things sometimes, but a universal undesirable trait is when someone talks about themselves too much.

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PLAYBOY: What is the key to inner confidence?

Elsa Moreck: I think confidence stems from being okay with whatever happens. I’m not saying that nothing ever bothers you; I actually completely disagree with that. I think being confident comes from understanding that you’re not going to be everyone’s cup of tea. If you’re going to put yourself out there, naturally, you are going to get rejected sometimes.

Also, putting yourself in real dating situations builds confidence and trust within yourself. People who continuously go for it end up winning more than people who sit on the bench while trying to over-strategize how to do things correctly.

PLAYBOY: Do nice guys finish last? If so, why?

Elsa Moreck: In my experience, nice guys definitely finish last, but let’s get clear on the definitions. People mistakenly think that a “nice guy” is the same as a “good guy.” Nice guys are good guys that lack boundaries and standards, and no one respects a person who doesn’t have boundaries and standards. It’s almost impossible for a woman to be in love with you if she does not respect you. If she can maneuver you in any way like a puppy dog, it’s going to be really hard for her to be turned on by you.

PLAYBOY: Dating is relative; too much attention for one person is not enough attention for another. What’s a good way to navigate this dynamic?

Elsa Moreck: Communication! And I think communication has gone out of style, especially with Gen Z dating. Communication seems to be a prevalent aspect that’s missing in modern dating. People don’t communicate anymore. There is a way to discuss the right amount of attention with someone without scaring them off. Make it playful and find the middle ground.

PLAYBOY: Valentine’s Day 2025—how did you spoil your significant other?

Elsa Moreck: I think a better question is how did he spoil me? No, the spoiling is definitely mutual. This Valentine’s Day, we cooked a new meal together, Jambalaya, which is one of his favorite meals. We’re also cooking a dessert that I love. Words of affirmation are big for me, so he’s going to be writing me a love letter.

PLAYBOY: Going forward, what can PLAYBOY readers be on the lookout for?

Elsa Moreck: Look for me more on YouTube! I’m really excited about that. I have been doing TikTok and Instagram for a while, and that’s going really well, but I’m ready for a new challenge. So, I’m going to be on YouTube. My audience has been asking for that for a while. I do livestreams every weekend and they’re usually 40 minutes to an hour. So, again, I’m excited to take that to YouTube!

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