There’s no two ways around it—2025 has brought forth chaotic times. With everything considered, one can’t blame you for partially fantasizing about alternate realities. To us at PLAYBOY, that poses an intriguing question (imagine the possibilities); how would dating dynamics operate if money did not exist?
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It’s certainly a thought-provoking concept—a mindfuck, if you will. Regardless of how you ponder, there aren’t really any wrong answers since it is entirely hypothetical.
Frankly, if money did not exist, there are likely more concerning conversations to have. Still, if you’re in for a mental swim, it’s quite fun to dive into these pools of thought. For creative inspiration on this topic, naturally, the digital rivers of Reddit are just one click away.
As always, clarity can be sought by referring to opinions from experts in the field. Let’s see what the word is.
If Money Did Not Exist, Would Dating Dynamics Differ?
PLAYBOY reached out to London-based dating guru Oloni for a few thoughts on this prompt.
The lovely Oloni asserts that, without money, “dating would be stripped down to its most raw, emotional, and intentional form. Without financial status, gifts, or extravagant dates as factors, attraction would lean entirely on emotional intimacy, intellectual stimulation, shared values and culture.
“Love languages like ‘quality time’ and ‘acts of service’ would take precedence over material expressions of love,” Oloni continued. From there, she addresses the elephant in the room by suggesting, “Power dynamics would shift to no financial provider roles, no ‘who pays?’ debates, and no transactional dating. People would have to assess relationships based on compatibility, effort, and emotional investment rather than financial security or lifestyle.”
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Next, Playboy Club creator Alexandra Stitchins offered a few perspectives on this if-money-did-not-exist predicament.
Alex hopes that “dating dynamics wouldn’t differ at all if money did not exist. Regardless if one person is the main source of income or typically pays more than the other partner, these acts should be committed willingly and out of love.”
Staying with that line of thinking, Alex says, “I would never want to be with someone who pays for everything, but then holds it over my head or throws it in my face when we have an unrelated disagreement! To the contrary, if I’m spoiling my man, I do it because I want to and because it makes me feel good.” That is a very valid point, especially since having money in a situation is often viewed as maintaining control.
Finally for a totally different take on the idea, dating coach Talitha Troupe lays down the law on her idea of a dating world with no money.
“It costs to court, when you offer a woman nothing but time… expect only her absence,” Troupe told PLAYBOY. “You cannot date in 2025 with no money. When a man plans, provides, and executes, it makes his lady feel safe and protected and you cannot ever sustain a relationship if she doesn’t feel safe… she’ll always be looking for that security, especially if the woman you’re after is already a strong 7 or more.”
Something to Keep in Mind
Unlike other sex, dating and relationships topics that we’ve covered, this “if money did not exist” scenario is not as applicable to everyday life. Be that as it may, this topic gives the eager and wandering imagination a path to head down. After all—what do you think Playboy Fiction is for?
Overall, every relationship IRL should seek to strike a healthy balance of give and take: mentally, emotionally, physically, spiritually and yes, financially.
We acknowledge that not everyone’s earnings are created equal, but monetary gestures can be small and over time if pressed for cash. Often, it is the thought that counts, because when a relationship is completely and willingly bankrolled by one side, dependence can arise.
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