Masturbation is one of those activities that tends to be conducted in a few pretty straightforward ways: you go at it alone in your cozy spot of choice, or you do it with a partner (the latter of which I can say, from experience, is a pretty smoking hot thing to do).
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But when it comes to friends, usually they don’t do it together as casually as they would binge a Netflix show with a bowl of popcorn in tow. Usually.
I was recently prowling Reddit’s sex sub when I came across a truly thought-provoking conversation on the topic. The female poster explained that she and another female friend (who she calls Laura) had been masturbating together since they were teens, first as an experiment, then as a thing they clearly both mutually enjoyed enough to continue it into adulthood.
An already-fascinating situation gets even more interesting when they hang out with a male friend, who the OP calls “Mark”, and they end up telling him about what they do.
“Mark got really curious, and so we shared more details, and he ended up asking if he could join in,” she writes. “We said we’d think about it and kinda laughed it off. And after sobering up, her and I did think about it and it’s kinda complicated. We’re both actually pretty down to accept him into our secret two member club, he’s a really good friend and it sounds fun. But then there’s the fact he’s a guy, and maybe that could mess with the vibe. That’s kinda unfair though, just because he has a penis doesn’t mean he shouldn’t be as welcome. I don’t know. Overall, her and I are way more leaning toward letting him join. It would be really fun. Should we go for it? And if we do, how do we make sure it doesn’t mess with the friendship?”
That’s not a situation you hear every day – which is why we reached out to an expert for their take on the topic. Maria Orrego, sex therapist and the voice of the Playboy Advisor for Playboy.com, offered her thoughts about how to navigate the unique “threesome”.
“Exploring sexuality with friends can be thrilling, but the key to keeping it hot and drama-free is crystal-clear communication,” Orrego says. “If you and your friends are curious and willing to experiment together, more power to you! But be mindful that you are taking a risk by mixing sexual experiences with friendship. To keep things fun, exciting, and emotionally safe, regular check-ins are essential. Everyone involved should feel comfortable expressing their feelings, concerns, and desires with transparency and honesty.”
A tall order, to say the least. But Orrego believes its possible if all parties involved keep communicating.
“As long as there’s mutual understanding, ongoing communication, and a commitment to respecting each other’s boundaries, these dynamics can work. The goal is not just to explore pleasure but to ensure that your friendships remain intact and that everyone involved feels emotionally safe and respected. If you’re all in and excited to play, go for it! Just remember, honesty and regular check-ins keep the chemistry sizzling and the friendships solid. Sexy adventures are best when everyone feels safe, heard, and fully on board.”
There you have it. So it turns out you can masturbate with your friends, under the correct circumstances. But the question is, would you?
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