The year was 2014. Singer/songwriter Taylor Swift dropped an album entitled 1999. At the Academy Awards, John Travolta accidentally referred to Idina Menzel as “Adele Dazeem.” The internet was flooded with leaked nude pix of Jennifer Lawrence.

And I grew a beard. Adding scruff to my repertoire was such a life-defining, life-affirming moment that I still recall its origin story, even a decade later.

I hadn’t shaved for five days, and I’m a genetically fuzzy man, so it was becoming a problem. My facial scraggle stuck out in every direction, the upper lip hair was way longer than the lower chin hair, and the whole mess had the consistency of an old-timey straw broom. But I didn’t enjoy shaving—who does, really?—so I thought, Maybe if I carve this sucker into a beard, my shaving life will dramatically improve.

So carve I did, and two things quickly became apparent:

1. Proper beard carving is just as time-consuming as straight-up shaving, if not more so.

2. Facial hair suited me.

So here we are, ten years on, and I still dig the beard, and my family still digs the beard, and the world at large seems to dig the beard, so it ain’t goin’ anywhere. Now that I’m a veteran beard guy, I can definitively confirm that there are plenty of reasons to bask in the joy of facial hair, among them…

Beards Make Great Props

How many Octobers have you thought something along the lines of, Man, a Jon Snow Halloween costume would be dope. Where can I get a good beard? You know where you can get a good beard? Your freakin’ face, that’s where. Grow your own and you’ll save money on All Hallow’s Eve gear, you won’t have to scratch the itches that come courtesy of cheap-ass faux facial hair, and nobody will tell you, “Dude, your pretend beard sucks.” (They might tell you that your real beard sucks, but that’s on you.)

Way Less Nicks and Scrapes

Regardless of the tool you use to hack your facial hair—disposable razor, straight razor, electric razor, whatever—at some point, your face will suffer. If you shave five times a week, there’s a 38.4% chance you’ll draw blood (statistics courtesy of me), but if you shave zero times a week, there’s a 00.0% chance you’ll draw blood (statistics also courtesy of me).

Beards Give You a New (and Very Inexpensive) Toy

I play with my beard incessantly. I’ll pull on the chin hair, I’ll nibble on the soul patch, and I’ll do this strange thing where I take the tips of my fingers and stroke the hair on my cheeks up, against the grain. Despite the fact that my beard manipulation is super-satisfying and not at all weird, I never do it in public.

You’re Part of the Beard Tribe

Let’s turn it over to Increditools, who tell us, “Around 33% of adult men in the United States report consistently wearing a beard, while another 27% indicate they sometimes have one, meaning that about 60% of American men have beards at least part of the time. Comparatively, approximately 44% of men globally have full beards, highlighting the growing popularity of facial hair among men in various cultures.” There’s a one-in-three chance that some of your buddies boast some facial hair, so why not hop aboard the beard train and join three out of ten of ’em?

Done Right, They Can Make You Look Like a Cuddly Teddy Bear

Significant others really, really love chilling and Netflixing with cuddly teddy bears, so get your beard up to snuff and reap the rewards.